Jaz opened her eyes, and Ren met them for a moment, his expression inscrutable. His gaze shifted down to her hand as she reached toward his, her pinky meeting his own. He gently curled his finger around hers, but she pulled back, and he shifted his gaze back up toward her with some puzzlement.
"How long would you like me to refrain from... showing you things?" she asked. "And... what things?"
Monica opened her eyes as Jaz stilled her hand and asked her questions, and she blinked with curiosity between Jaz and Ren. Ren kept his gaze on Jaz, at least for a moment, before his eyes drifted off to the side.
"Just... I would prefer you refrained when we're around people who don't know," he said quietly. "It's distracting." Then, with a soft sigh, he brought his gaze back to Jaz, and in the same gesture, held his hand out toward her, his other hand squeezing Monica's without quite realizing.
Monica smiled softly. She gently squeezed Ren's hand in return, and lightly rolled Jaz's knuckles between hers--a gentle, almost playfully cajoling gesture, her eyes curiously watching Jaz.
Leaving the Djinn
Moderator: On Dreams And Desire
Re: Leaving the Djinn
"Just... I would prefer you refrained when we're around people who don't know," Ren said quietly. "It's distracting."
Jaz couldn't help the short, quiet giggle that escaped her. In the same moment, Ren sighed softly and looked at her, holding his hand out.
So begrudging, this one, but Jaz didn't think he was frustrated with her, exactly. Or even about the ways they were touching. She found him... interesting. He had layers--that was certain.
Jaz looked at Ren's proffered hand for a moment but felt Monica start moving her hand again, rolling their knuckles together gently as though in encouragement. Now who's distracted, Jaz thought about herself, but she smiled and warmly set her hand down inside Ren's, bringing to mind her complete and utter joy when Ren offered his hand the first time.
All felt right now, and Jaz closed her eyes, leaning first into the experience of Monica's touch, then Ren's before mentally backing away just slightly so she could observe both at once.
Jaz felt the room around them, the peacefully curated space that had harbored many small gatherings such as theirs. She felt even the temple they were inside of and how many years of devotion the walls held. And she felt these two people, their interactions with each other spread out over a number of years, kind and gentle and trusting.
The djinn fiercely thanked the fae gate for its kindness. She felt so incredibly lucky to have found these two people so quickly.
Opening her eyes, Jaz saw the blue of her skin returning slowly on both of her hands. Already, her left hand was almost completely back to blue. The sight deepened her smile. Tentatively, she leaned forward and pulled her fingers up out of Monica's so she could gently explore the inside of Monica's wrist. Then, looking to Ren, Jaz brought their twined hands closer so she could lay her head on them. She nuzzled them slightly and then tentatively pressed her lips to the top of Ren's thumb, humming pleasantly.
She wanted to be closer to both of them.
((OOC: I think, if Monica were to catch anything she did not recognize from Jaz, it would be the fae gates, and its description is in the first post.))
Jaz couldn't help the short, quiet giggle that escaped her. In the same moment, Ren sighed softly and looked at her, holding his hand out.
So begrudging, this one, but Jaz didn't think he was frustrated with her, exactly. Or even about the ways they were touching. She found him... interesting. He had layers--that was certain.
Jaz looked at Ren's proffered hand for a moment but felt Monica start moving her hand again, rolling their knuckles together gently as though in encouragement. Now who's distracted, Jaz thought about herself, but she smiled and warmly set her hand down inside Ren's, bringing to mind her complete and utter joy when Ren offered his hand the first time.
All felt right now, and Jaz closed her eyes, leaning first into the experience of Monica's touch, then Ren's before mentally backing away just slightly so she could observe both at once.
Jaz felt the room around them, the peacefully curated space that had harbored many small gatherings such as theirs. She felt even the temple they were inside of and how many years of devotion the walls held. And she felt these two people, their interactions with each other spread out over a number of years, kind and gentle and trusting.
The djinn fiercely thanked the fae gate for its kindness. She felt so incredibly lucky to have found these two people so quickly.
Opening her eyes, Jaz saw the blue of her skin returning slowly on both of her hands. Already, her left hand was almost completely back to blue. The sight deepened her smile. Tentatively, she leaned forward and pulled her fingers up out of Monica's so she could gently explore the inside of Monica's wrist. Then, looking to Ren, Jaz brought their twined hands closer so she could lay her head on them. She nuzzled them slightly and then tentatively pressed her lips to the top of Ren's thumb, humming pleasantly.
She wanted to be closer to both of them.
((OOC: I think, if Monica were to catch anything she did not recognize from Jaz, it would be the fae gates, and its description is in the first post.))
Re: Leaving the Djinn
Jaz giggled quietly and Ren frowned, but he didn't let it deter his offered hand. She smiled warmly and set her hand inside his, and joy practically lept through her skin and up his arm. He squeezed her hand and Monica's tightly, almost startled, but then relaxed. Jaz closed her eyes, and Ren turned his gaze back to Monica. She gently squeezed his hand again in an echo of his gesture, and she offered him yet another warm smile before closing her eyes as well. With a slow exhale, Ren also closed his.
Peace and trust permeated his thoughts, gratitude for this space, for Monica, for the temple. He was glad that's how Jaz felt, though he was a little embarassed thinking of some of his interactions with Monica over the years. Mostly just conversations, none of them detailed, but he wondered what exactly Jaz was gleaning and feeling about it. And, was Monica having the same thoughts? Seeing the same things? He couldn't quite help opening his eyes to look at her. A tear fell slowly down her cheek, her smile warm and radiant, absolutely beautiful. Ren squeezed her hand again, and she gently squeezed back.
Jaz opened her eyes, and Ren turned his gaze to her. She examined her hands, how they were slowly gaining blue from his and Monica's touch, and she smiled happily. He let show a soft smile as well. As strange as all this was, it was also... nice, for lack of a better word. He thought that maybe, he might not be quite as much of a hermit if more interactions felt like this. He watched with a warmth blooming in his chest as Jaz brought her cheek to nuzzle against her hand entwined with his, then placed a kiss against his thumb. It was almost tempting to release Monica's hand so he could caress Jaz's hair, but he hesitated, unsure if he actually wanted everything that gesture would entail.
---
Monica was overjoyed by the thoughts of the temple that--that Jaz was showing her, she supposed. She knew well the sights--the room they were in for gatherings not terribly unlike this one; the great room for togetherness and contemplation--but she saw them with fresh eyes, felt their welcome to a stranger, and Jaz' understanding of the devotion that went into their creation and care. She felt so, so happy for all of it--feeling seen, and feeling helpful--and she felt a soft tear begin to roll down her cheek. Her fingers gently stretched between Jaz's, asking for something or perhaps offering, she wasn't entirely sure. Maybe just for Jaz to feel her happiness, too.
Ren squeezed her hand in his, and she squeezed his in reply, wondering how much of this filtered through to him. She did feel his trust in her, the gentleness they had shared over the years. She felt a deep gratitude from Jaz that she had met Monica and Ren so soon on her journey, thought of the gate that had brought Jaz here. At first it was conceptual, and then a vague image that Monica might have thought was just her imagination of the concept, but it grew far more crisp than she would have expected, and she eagerly took in the details she could see, curiosity elated for this new sight.
Jaz's fingers slid out from between Monica's, but only so they could explore up her wrist. Delight danced up Monica's skin in something like a sparkle, and Monica's fingertips reached up to gently mirror Jaz's touch. She felt vaguely aware that Jaz's attention was more outward--on the color of her skin, or intimacy with Ren--but Monica was quite content with her eyes closed, focused on her and Jaz's touch. In fact, she felt just the slightest of tugs from Ren's hand--a consideration to pull away, though he didn't follow through. Monica found that she wanted to encourage him to, though, and so she gently lifted her hand off the table, offering his some momentum. He followed it, which she was glad for. Not that she wasn't enjoying his touch, but she wanted him to explore what he felt called to explore, not to be tethered to her. She simply placed her newly-free hand on her chest and let out another soft hum, sinking into the delight in her wrist beneath the touch of Jaz's fingers.
---
Ren was surprised when Monica gently pushed his hand up from the table, her grip loose and unattached. A nudge. He felt a little bit worried as he slipped away--did she feel rejected? Was she rejecting him?--but he watched as she placed her hand on her chest and let out a happy hum, her eyes still closed and the fingers of her other hand touching Jaz's wrist, mirroring the ways that Jaz's fingers touched hers. They were having their own moment. A small jealousy grew uncomfortably hot in his chest, but he quickly realized how absurd it would be to sit there and feed it. He withdrew his attention from where Jaz and Monica touched, and looked back to Jaz before him, replayed her soft lips on his thumb, recalled his impulse to caress her hair. He started to reach toward her to do just that, but even still, he hesitated. He did gently squeeze her hand in his tighter, at least redirecting some of his energy there, but his free hand hovered awkwardly in the air briefly before settling down on his knee, perhaps just a little too shy to do much else at the moment.
Peace and trust permeated his thoughts, gratitude for this space, for Monica, for the temple. He was glad that's how Jaz felt, though he was a little embarassed thinking of some of his interactions with Monica over the years. Mostly just conversations, none of them detailed, but he wondered what exactly Jaz was gleaning and feeling about it. And, was Monica having the same thoughts? Seeing the same things? He couldn't quite help opening his eyes to look at her. A tear fell slowly down her cheek, her smile warm and radiant, absolutely beautiful. Ren squeezed her hand again, and she gently squeezed back.
Jaz opened her eyes, and Ren turned his gaze to her. She examined her hands, how they were slowly gaining blue from his and Monica's touch, and she smiled happily. He let show a soft smile as well. As strange as all this was, it was also... nice, for lack of a better word. He thought that maybe, he might not be quite as much of a hermit if more interactions felt like this. He watched with a warmth blooming in his chest as Jaz brought her cheek to nuzzle against her hand entwined with his, then placed a kiss against his thumb. It was almost tempting to release Monica's hand so he could caress Jaz's hair, but he hesitated, unsure if he actually wanted everything that gesture would entail.
---
Monica was overjoyed by the thoughts of the temple that--that Jaz was showing her, she supposed. She knew well the sights--the room they were in for gatherings not terribly unlike this one; the great room for togetherness and contemplation--but she saw them with fresh eyes, felt their welcome to a stranger, and Jaz' understanding of the devotion that went into their creation and care. She felt so, so happy for all of it--feeling seen, and feeling helpful--and she felt a soft tear begin to roll down her cheek. Her fingers gently stretched between Jaz's, asking for something or perhaps offering, she wasn't entirely sure. Maybe just for Jaz to feel her happiness, too.
Ren squeezed her hand in his, and she squeezed his in reply, wondering how much of this filtered through to him. She did feel his trust in her, the gentleness they had shared over the years. She felt a deep gratitude from Jaz that she had met Monica and Ren so soon on her journey, thought of the gate that had brought Jaz here. At first it was conceptual, and then a vague image that Monica might have thought was just her imagination of the concept, but it grew far more crisp than she would have expected, and she eagerly took in the details she could see, curiosity elated for this new sight.
Jaz's fingers slid out from between Monica's, but only so they could explore up her wrist. Delight danced up Monica's skin in something like a sparkle, and Monica's fingertips reached up to gently mirror Jaz's touch. She felt vaguely aware that Jaz's attention was more outward--on the color of her skin, or intimacy with Ren--but Monica was quite content with her eyes closed, focused on her and Jaz's touch. In fact, she felt just the slightest of tugs from Ren's hand--a consideration to pull away, though he didn't follow through. Monica found that she wanted to encourage him to, though, and so she gently lifted her hand off the table, offering his some momentum. He followed it, which she was glad for. Not that she wasn't enjoying his touch, but she wanted him to explore what he felt called to explore, not to be tethered to her. She simply placed her newly-free hand on her chest and let out another soft hum, sinking into the delight in her wrist beneath the touch of Jaz's fingers.
---
Ren was surprised when Monica gently pushed his hand up from the table, her grip loose and unattached. A nudge. He felt a little bit worried as he slipped away--did she feel rejected? Was she rejecting him?--but he watched as she placed her hand on her chest and let out a happy hum, her eyes still closed and the fingers of her other hand touching Jaz's wrist, mirroring the ways that Jaz's fingers touched hers. They were having their own moment. A small jealousy grew uncomfortably hot in his chest, but he quickly realized how absurd it would be to sit there and feed it. He withdrew his attention from where Jaz and Monica touched, and looked back to Jaz before him, replayed her soft lips on his thumb, recalled his impulse to caress her hair. He started to reach toward her to do just that, but even still, he hesitated. He did gently squeeze her hand in his tighter, at least redirecting some of his energy there, but his free hand hovered awkwardly in the air briefly before settling down on his knee, perhaps just a little too shy to do much else at the moment.
Re: Leaving the Djinn
Jaz sank into the sensation of her lips on Ren's thumb, though she was also keenly aware of the way Monica explored Jaz's wrist with curious fingers in response. The djinn pressed several more kisses on and around Ren's thumb, a warmth building at the center of her. This warmth, this fire, she was certain the others would feel it. It began to fountain pleasantly up from between her legs into her belly, her chest, and out both her arms. She felt her cheeks heat and suspected they were turning blue as well. She didn't care. In fact, she was delighted. Surely she could stay here in this lovely space Monica had so generously offered long enough for whatever needed to fade.
Or maybe they wouldn't leave. Maybe they would stay here for hours and hours together just enjoying this bliss that they were so tenderly weaving. Jaz smiled against Ren's thumb and felt Monica vibrate with a soft hum as it echoed down into the priestess' arm through her chest. Monica and Ren... it felt novel for them to have this kind of interaction. And suddenly Jaz felt a little bit like a key fitted gently into a lock, allowing the door to swing open so two rooms could see each other clearly, fully, for the first time. The sensation was a rush, a cascade, and more warmth bloomed out of Jaz.
Growing bolder now, Jaz used her thumb and forefinger to press into either side of the muscle of Monica's forearm, applying pulsing pressure and gently directing the blood coursing beneath. And with Ren, the edge of Jaz's tongue slipped subtly out of her mouth, tasting Ren's skin. She hummed a little more deeply as she caught tastes of her own skin, Monica's skin, the raspberry, and the crystalline coolness of the stone Jaz had given Ren. Memories erupted from Jaz, then, of the waterfall where she had collected the clear stones with Suldana. She thought briefly of how much Suldana would have liked Monica, and the thought made Jaz even warmer.
Her back was beginning to ache, however, from leaning over toward Ren in such a way, and she imagined climbing into Ren's lap with her legs wrapped around him, kissing his jaw while Monica stood behind her, hands in Jaz's hair.
Or maybe they wouldn't leave. Maybe they would stay here for hours and hours together just enjoying this bliss that they were so tenderly weaving. Jaz smiled against Ren's thumb and felt Monica vibrate with a soft hum as it echoed down into the priestess' arm through her chest. Monica and Ren... it felt novel for them to have this kind of interaction. And suddenly Jaz felt a little bit like a key fitted gently into a lock, allowing the door to swing open so two rooms could see each other clearly, fully, for the first time. The sensation was a rush, a cascade, and more warmth bloomed out of Jaz.
Growing bolder now, Jaz used her thumb and forefinger to press into either side of the muscle of Monica's forearm, applying pulsing pressure and gently directing the blood coursing beneath. And with Ren, the edge of Jaz's tongue slipped subtly out of her mouth, tasting Ren's skin. She hummed a little more deeply as she caught tastes of her own skin, Monica's skin, the raspberry, and the crystalline coolness of the stone Jaz had given Ren. Memories erupted from Jaz, then, of the waterfall where she had collected the clear stones with Suldana. She thought briefly of how much Suldana would have liked Monica, and the thought made Jaz even warmer.
Her back was beginning to ache, however, from leaning over toward Ren in such a way, and she imagined climbing into Ren's lap with her legs wrapped around him, kissing his jaw while Monica stood behind her, hands in Jaz's hair.
Re: Leaving the Djinn
Jaz placed more kisses on and around Ren's thumb, and he felt a fire blaze within her, within him. Warmth and happiness, a flood of longing for hours and hours of this bliss. Her cheeks gained a shade of blue, and she smiled against his hand. He felt paralyzed. A fear gripped at his chest, starting to urge toward disengagement, but his eyes beheld beauty he didn't want to turn away from, his hand enrapt with pleasant warmth he didn't want to leave.
And then something clicked into place, like a key sliding perfectly into a lock. A door swung open and he felt Monica, too, the joy and curiosity and openness she shared with Jaz. She noticed him, too, and welcomed him--beckoned him closer. He could feel Jaz' fingers pressing into the muscles in Monica's forearm, pulsing in harmony with her heartbeat. It excited him, his own blood flowing in rhythm with theirs. Jaz hummed in harmony with Monica, and reveled in touch and taste, memories of past and present swirling together. A waterfall where Jaz had collected precious stones--the stone she'd given to Ren, which still rested in his pocket. One of Jaz's companions--one of her family--collecting stones with her, reminding Jaz of Monica.
Monica loved the memories that sprung forth, and Ren had to admit that it brought him delight to see her so delighted. She seemed almost child-like, full of awe in the experience. Ren felt a little bit more outside of it, though. Watching a play, perhaps, rather than fully immersed inside of it. Happy, entertained, but separate.
At least until Jaz imagined climbing onto his lap... her legs wrapped around him, kissing his jaw, elbows comfortably resting on his shoulders. Monica standing behind Jaz, hands in her hair... eyes meeting Ren's with a knowing smile.
---
Monica felt a fire grow within Jaz, and she lovingly stoked it with fingertips on skin, with joy and awe and curiosity toward the totality of this experience. There was just a small notion toward caution--that she could see the possibility of getting lost in this interaction, of forgetting her duties outside this room. But, they still had time before that was any real concern. She welcomed the fire into herself, and felt a lock release, a door swing open. On the other side of it was Ren, and she welcomed him, beckoned him closer. He was always so far away, and she wanted him closer. Jaz massaged the muscles in Monica's forearm, and she felt Ren sink happily, excitedly into the sensation with her. He was letting himself feel, and it made her so happy.
Jaz shared memories of taste and touch, of skin and berries and precious stones--of waterfalls, and family. Monica reminded Jaz of her family--was someone Jaz thought her family would like--and another wave of happiness crested over her. She felt girlish, giddy, shy in only the most delightful of ways. She felt Ren's attention on her, on her delight, and while she was happy about it, it was almost too much. She very nearly withdrew somehow--perhaps sinking further into the sensation of Jaz's fingers against her arm--but then Jaz invited her attention elsewhere, and she followed fluidly through the thought of Jaz climbing into Ren's lap, of Monica standing behind her. Monica happily entertained the idea, imagning her fingers running through Jaz's hair, looking over Jaz's shoulder to meet Ren's gaze, to take in the look of arousal on his face. Excitement swirled through her, but that note of caution also flared again. She registered a note of fear in Ren's expression, and she understood.
---
"Stop."
Ren watched Jaz carefully in the wake of his--yes, command. Was it wrong of him to command her in that moment? But what else should he have done? He'd at least tried to say it as gently as possible, to only pull himself back into his own body, to not pull away further than was needed. But of course, he'd let Jaz pull away further if she needed to, whether due to how she understood the command or simply her own discomfort. But he hoped that much would be her choice. His eyes held a note of apology, in case it wasn't.
Though, if she still held his hand, he would try to offer her further understanding, in the ways he'd felt thoughts flow between them. He was not upset, but he was afraid. Of getting lost, of losing control, of being hurt in some way, of hurting Jaz or Monica. Spectres from his past tried to climb into his attention, but he did what he could to hold them at bay; there was no need for Jaz to be burdened with the specifics.
---
Monica opened her eyes calmly to look at Ren when he spoke up. She made no move to retract physically from Jaz, or even really mentally; she just made sure to stay on her side of the door that had opened, and to pay attention to Ren through the means he was used to--chiefly, her eyes and ears. Judging by his vaguely apologetic expression, he seemed to be okay. She had seen him in--well, not quite this state before, but something similar. He harbored so much distrust--of himself, and of others. She'd made strides with him, but it was all slow going. It made sense that this would be a lot for him--in fact, having a brief moment to reflect on that all, Monica was glad they'd been able to explore as much as they had.
((OOC: Mostly adding that last bit since Monica is honestly happy for Jaz to glean things from her if they remain in contact. Monica will also not make any attempt to stop Jaz from pulling away from her if she wants to, though.))
And then something clicked into place, like a key sliding perfectly into a lock. A door swung open and he felt Monica, too, the joy and curiosity and openness she shared with Jaz. She noticed him, too, and welcomed him--beckoned him closer. He could feel Jaz' fingers pressing into the muscles in Monica's forearm, pulsing in harmony with her heartbeat. It excited him, his own blood flowing in rhythm with theirs. Jaz hummed in harmony with Monica, and reveled in touch and taste, memories of past and present swirling together. A waterfall where Jaz had collected precious stones--the stone she'd given to Ren, which still rested in his pocket. One of Jaz's companions--one of her family--collecting stones with her, reminding Jaz of Monica.
Monica loved the memories that sprung forth, and Ren had to admit that it brought him delight to see her so delighted. She seemed almost child-like, full of awe in the experience. Ren felt a little bit more outside of it, though. Watching a play, perhaps, rather than fully immersed inside of it. Happy, entertained, but separate.
At least until Jaz imagined climbing onto his lap... her legs wrapped around him, kissing his jaw, elbows comfortably resting on his shoulders. Monica standing behind Jaz, hands in her hair... eyes meeting Ren's with a knowing smile.
---
Monica felt a fire grow within Jaz, and she lovingly stoked it with fingertips on skin, with joy and awe and curiosity toward the totality of this experience. There was just a small notion toward caution--that she could see the possibility of getting lost in this interaction, of forgetting her duties outside this room. But, they still had time before that was any real concern. She welcomed the fire into herself, and felt a lock release, a door swing open. On the other side of it was Ren, and she welcomed him, beckoned him closer. He was always so far away, and she wanted him closer. Jaz massaged the muscles in Monica's forearm, and she felt Ren sink happily, excitedly into the sensation with her. He was letting himself feel, and it made her so happy.
Jaz shared memories of taste and touch, of skin and berries and precious stones--of waterfalls, and family. Monica reminded Jaz of her family--was someone Jaz thought her family would like--and another wave of happiness crested over her. She felt girlish, giddy, shy in only the most delightful of ways. She felt Ren's attention on her, on her delight, and while she was happy about it, it was almost too much. She very nearly withdrew somehow--perhaps sinking further into the sensation of Jaz's fingers against her arm--but then Jaz invited her attention elsewhere, and she followed fluidly through the thought of Jaz climbing into Ren's lap, of Monica standing behind her. Monica happily entertained the idea, imagning her fingers running through Jaz's hair, looking over Jaz's shoulder to meet Ren's gaze, to take in the look of arousal on his face. Excitement swirled through her, but that note of caution also flared again. She registered a note of fear in Ren's expression, and she understood.
---
"Stop."
Ren watched Jaz carefully in the wake of his--yes, command. Was it wrong of him to command her in that moment? But what else should he have done? He'd at least tried to say it as gently as possible, to only pull himself back into his own body, to not pull away further than was needed. But of course, he'd let Jaz pull away further if she needed to, whether due to how she understood the command or simply her own discomfort. But he hoped that much would be her choice. His eyes held a note of apology, in case it wasn't.
Though, if she still held his hand, he would try to offer her further understanding, in the ways he'd felt thoughts flow between them. He was not upset, but he was afraid. Of getting lost, of losing control, of being hurt in some way, of hurting Jaz or Monica. Spectres from his past tried to climb into his attention, but he did what he could to hold them at bay; there was no need for Jaz to be burdened with the specifics.
---
Monica opened her eyes calmly to look at Ren when he spoke up. She made no move to retract physically from Jaz, or even really mentally; she just made sure to stay on her side of the door that had opened, and to pay attention to Ren through the means he was used to--chiefly, her eyes and ears. Judging by his vaguely apologetic expression, he seemed to be okay. She had seen him in--well, not quite this state before, but something similar. He harbored so much distrust--of himself, and of others. She'd made strides with him, but it was all slow going. It made sense that this would be a lot for him--in fact, having a brief moment to reflect on that all, Monica was glad they'd been able to explore as much as they had.
((OOC: Mostly adding that last bit since Monica is honestly happy for Jaz to glean things from her if they remain in contact. Monica will also not make any attempt to stop Jaz from pulling away from her if she wants to, though.))
Re: Leaving the Djinn
Jaz had thoroughly entranced herself in being a conduit and even in gently leading the interaction. She had never felt so needed before. And while there were short moments of fear or resistance from the two humans, Jaz only opened herself wider to be an even better conduit, which seemed to wash them away. Jaz was about to act on the fantasy she had imagined when Ren spoke.
"Stop." It was loud in Jaz's ears if only because everything had been so nonverbal just before. Sparks shot down Jaz's throat as it swelled and constricted her own vocal chords. She sat up slowly looking at Ren in confusion, eyebrows raised in concern, and though neither Monica nor Ren made any move to disentangle from her, the swirling fluidity the three of them had shared behind their eyes was abruptly gone. Ren's eyes were soft as though he expected this would hurt Jaz to some degree, and she looked down in sympathy. She certainly didn't want Ren doing anything he was uncomfortable with for her sake.
Dark thoughts clouded her mind. Had she been too insistent? Had she acted like Jarrett? Like the dark fae? Would they think she was a demon now?
She raised her eyebrows in her own form of apology and gently withdrew from both Monica and Ren, afraid of what they might catch from her if she didn't.
"I..." Jaz started to say, but the sound came out strangled. She took a breath and tried again--the temptation to get down and hug herself on the floor was strong. "That was..." Nope, still couldn't manage more than a couple sounds at once. She took one more deep breath, trying to relax the locked-up parts of her throat and stomach. "Thank you." That seemed to aid the relaxation somewhat, but she couldn't meet Monica's or Ren's eyes. "That was much more than I had any reason to expect."
((OOC: I'm imagining that Jaz's cheeks, part of her scalp, and her arms up to her elbows are blue rn, but like, she wouldn't notice herself.))
"Stop." It was loud in Jaz's ears if only because everything had been so nonverbal just before. Sparks shot down Jaz's throat as it swelled and constricted her own vocal chords. She sat up slowly looking at Ren in confusion, eyebrows raised in concern, and though neither Monica nor Ren made any move to disentangle from her, the swirling fluidity the three of them had shared behind their eyes was abruptly gone. Ren's eyes were soft as though he expected this would hurt Jaz to some degree, and she looked down in sympathy. She certainly didn't want Ren doing anything he was uncomfortable with for her sake.
Dark thoughts clouded her mind. Had she been too insistent? Had she acted like Jarrett? Like the dark fae? Would they think she was a demon now?
She raised her eyebrows in her own form of apology and gently withdrew from both Monica and Ren, afraid of what they might catch from her if she didn't.
"I..." Jaz started to say, but the sound came out strangled. She took a breath and tried again--the temptation to get down and hug herself on the floor was strong. "That was..." Nope, still couldn't manage more than a couple sounds at once. She took one more deep breath, trying to relax the locked-up parts of her throat and stomach. "Thank you." That seemed to aid the relaxation somewhat, but she couldn't meet Monica's or Ren's eyes. "That was much more than I had any reason to expect."
((OOC: I'm imagining that Jaz's cheeks, part of her scalp, and her arms up to her elbows are blue rn, but like, she wouldn't notice herself.))
Re: Leaving the Djinn
Jaz blinked to Ren, stunned and concerned. She took in his expression, and looked down.
Both Ren and Monica worried in that moment, looking in toward the door that had opened and finding it shut. Jaz raised her eyebrows in apology as she slid her hands away from both of them. Neither made any move to stop Jaz's gesture, though Ren looked down at his own lap when her touch had fully withdrawn, and that prompted Monica to toss her worried expression toward him.
"I..." Jaz started to say, but the sound came out strangled, and Ren's shoulders tensed. Monica's gaze tracked between Jaz and Ren, unsure where her worry wanted to direct itself most. Jaz took a deep breath, but looked so, so small.
"That was..." She tried again, but she was just too constricted to get the words out. She drew in another deep breath, and Monica was glad to see a hint of relaxation in her posture--something starting to release. In the meantime though, Ren's breathing grew almost too quiet, his body unnaturally still.
"Thank you," Jaz managed to get out, though she still didn't raise her eyes. "That was much more than I had any reason to expect."
"You are very welcome, Jaz." Monica offered with a full but tender voice, full of a desire to comfort. She looked to Ren after she spoke, hoping to see some change in him.
He had relaxed slightly, his shoulders a little less close to his ears. He took in a deep breath of his own, quiet but palpable.
Monica turned her gaze back to Jaz again, assessing whether to try to offer something additional, or give Ren and Jaz both another moment to recorver.
Both Ren and Monica worried in that moment, looking in toward the door that had opened and finding it shut. Jaz raised her eyebrows in apology as she slid her hands away from both of them. Neither made any move to stop Jaz's gesture, though Ren looked down at his own lap when her touch had fully withdrawn, and that prompted Monica to toss her worried expression toward him.
"I..." Jaz started to say, but the sound came out strangled, and Ren's shoulders tensed. Monica's gaze tracked between Jaz and Ren, unsure where her worry wanted to direct itself most. Jaz took a deep breath, but looked so, so small.
"That was..." She tried again, but she was just too constricted to get the words out. She drew in another deep breath, and Monica was glad to see a hint of relaxation in her posture--something starting to release. In the meantime though, Ren's breathing grew almost too quiet, his body unnaturally still.
"Thank you," Jaz managed to get out, though she still didn't raise her eyes. "That was much more than I had any reason to expect."
"You are very welcome, Jaz." Monica offered with a full but tender voice, full of a desire to comfort. She looked to Ren after she spoke, hoping to see some change in him.
He had relaxed slightly, his shoulders a little less close to his ears. He took in a deep breath of his own, quiet but palpable.
Monica turned her gaze back to Jaz again, assessing whether to try to offer something additional, or give Ren and Jaz both another moment to recorver.
Re: Leaving the Djinn
"You are very welcome, Jaz," Monica said, and Jaz took another deep breath, finally looking up at the priestess, her shoulders back. She bit at her bottom lip slightly as she took Ren in from her peripheral vision.
"Where..." Jaz started, her voice still not fully recovered. "The gear, for camping. Where... should we go again?" Jaz tilted her head, tempted to try to shake clear of the fantasy of Ren before her mind insisted on adding to it--palpable and demanding as it was in her body. She closed her eyes and pulled her eyebrows together. She was going to need some time to recover from all that, blue skin or no.
The interruption, the retraction, it was taking a toll. She reminded herself how she had disentangled from Tenaya, Sultana, and Tigre once her sorala had begun and the days spent in isolation. She could do this. Jaz just needed to remember that some of what she needed was better than none--her body could still use this nourishment.
Jaz swallowed and opened her eyes, a small, embarrassed smile peeking out from one corner of her mouth.
"Where..." Jaz started, her voice still not fully recovered. "The gear, for camping. Where... should we go again?" Jaz tilted her head, tempted to try to shake clear of the fantasy of Ren before her mind insisted on adding to it--palpable and demanding as it was in her body. She closed her eyes and pulled her eyebrows together. She was going to need some time to recover from all that, blue skin or no.
The interruption, the retraction, it was taking a toll. She reminded herself how she had disentangled from Tenaya, Sultana, and Tigre once her sorala had begun and the days spent in isolation. She could do this. Jaz just needed to remember that some of what she needed was better than none--her body could still use this nourishment.
Jaz swallowed and opened her eyes, a small, embarrassed smile peeking out from one corner of her mouth.
Re: Leaving the Djinn
Defensiveness clawed at Ren's chest. To Jaz's credit, she was trying to move on. Ren should, too. Nothing bad had actually happened. They'd just gotten close enough that Ren still reeled a little, like the moment footing recovered and weight rebalanced after almost stumbling off a cliff.
Jaz had thanked them. Her voice wasn't especially convincing, but she had done the right thing. Monica gave her welcome, her voice betraying her concern, but she was giving them both space. Now, it was Ren's turn to offer an olive branch.
"Where..." Jaz spoke up again before he could, and his gaze flinched into a glare, though still directed toward his lap. "The gear, for camping," she went on, "Where... should we go again?"
He wasn't angry exactly, except that something just simply became too much. He couldn't keep sitting in this small, dimly-lit room. Without a word, he stood and pushed through the hides, eager to return to the daylight of the apothecary's window.
---
Monica was only briefly startled when Ren stood up and left. Before the moment was even over, her gaze returned to Jaz, her eyes apologetic.
"Give him a moment," she gently beseeched Jaz--or reassured her, depending on whether Jaz looked about to follow Ren or not.
Jaz had thanked them. Her voice wasn't especially convincing, but she had done the right thing. Monica gave her welcome, her voice betraying her concern, but she was giving them both space. Now, it was Ren's turn to offer an olive branch.
"Where..." Jaz spoke up again before he could, and his gaze flinched into a glare, though still directed toward his lap. "The gear, for camping," she went on, "Where... should we go again?"
He wasn't angry exactly, except that something just simply became too much. He couldn't keep sitting in this small, dimly-lit room. Without a word, he stood and pushed through the hides, eager to return to the daylight of the apothecary's window.
---
Monica was only briefly startled when Ren stood up and left. Before the moment was even over, her gaze returned to Jaz, her eyes apologetic.
"Give him a moment," she gently beseeched Jaz--or reassured her, depending on whether Jaz looked about to follow Ren or not.
Re: Leaving the Djinn
Jaz's head snapped up as she registered that Ren was standing. Not just standing, leaving.
She wanted to follow him. Maybe he thought it was easier to just show her where the camping gear was?
"Give him a moment," Monica said to Jaz, and a pit fell into Jaz's stomach. Okay, no benefit of the doubt, then. He was much angrier than Jaz had even realized. Gods, she must have really done something wrong.
Jaz looked to Monica, the room feeling entirely too large all of a sudden, her eyebrows pulled together with worry. The blue of her skin began receding significantly faster than it had grown, returned to rapidly to pale and beige. All at once, Jaz felt like crying.
No, she was crying.
What had she missed? Did he not want her to stay with him anymore at all?
Gods, maybe she should stay with the Roens.
But Monica had only told Jaz to give him a moment. At least Monica thought this was salvageable. Somehow.
Hard to believe that only moments before they had all been... what exactly? Bonded together?
Maybe Jaz had imagined it. Projected it. Maybe she saw what she had wanted to see in Ren and dismissed actual signals. Maybe...
But... there was no way to be duplicitous in that kind of touch. And wasn't Jaz's fantasy of Ren a question? An invitation? He had every right to turn it down. And she had every right to pull away as a result.
Had he... not wanted her to stop? But... then why command her? Didn't he know she couldn't...?
Gods, the man made no sense to her.
Jaz laughed nervously, her nervous system so completely haywire that she couldn't help it. "He does that sort of thing... a lot... then?" Jaz asked in a half-hearted singsong voice.
She looked down at her hands, and they looked entirely ill to her once again.
She wanted to follow him. Maybe he thought it was easier to just show her where the camping gear was?
"Give him a moment," Monica said to Jaz, and a pit fell into Jaz's stomach. Okay, no benefit of the doubt, then. He was much angrier than Jaz had even realized. Gods, she must have really done something wrong.
Jaz looked to Monica, the room feeling entirely too large all of a sudden, her eyebrows pulled together with worry. The blue of her skin began receding significantly faster than it had grown, returned to rapidly to pale and beige. All at once, Jaz felt like crying.
No, she was crying.
What had she missed? Did he not want her to stay with him anymore at all?
Gods, maybe she should stay with the Roens.
But Monica had only told Jaz to give him a moment. At least Monica thought this was salvageable. Somehow.
Hard to believe that only moments before they had all been... what exactly? Bonded together?
Maybe Jaz had imagined it. Projected it. Maybe she saw what she had wanted to see in Ren and dismissed actual signals. Maybe...
But... there was no way to be duplicitous in that kind of touch. And wasn't Jaz's fantasy of Ren a question? An invitation? He had every right to turn it down. And she had every right to pull away as a result.
Had he... not wanted her to stop? But... then why command her? Didn't he know she couldn't...?
Gods, the man made no sense to her.
Jaz laughed nervously, her nervous system so completely haywire that she couldn't help it. "He does that sort of thing... a lot... then?" Jaz asked in a half-hearted singsong voice.
She looked down at her hands, and they looked entirely ill to her once again.