Written Wonderland

The goddess had been searching Evan's eyes, but after he spoke she closed them. He hoped that meant that what he'd said had had gravity, and he clung the way she leaned into one of his hands, he could only hope to find comfort there. An ache was growing in his chest again, longing for the connection they had shared before, but he tried to focus on where their skin touched, finding what connection he could there.

She opened her eyes again and took in the sight of him, and a fresh flush of embarrassment and chill rippled over him, his muscles shivering just slightly as his attention turned to the temperature. The goddess smiled, though, which was of some relief, at least until she spoke.

"You have some nerve, saying that to me," she said, and a brief panic shot through Evan's chest before he re-grounded himself in her smile, in the way her neck still leaned against his hand. Then she brought a hand up to cover his, and he audibly exhaled, his feeling of relief sinking into his bones. The goddess leaned forward, and Evan serenely mirrored the motion, more than happy to bring their foreheads to rest against one another.

He considered saying something - I never would have gotten here without my nerve came to mind, but felt too trite. What else do you need? bubbled up, but that was starting to feel too passive. His thumbs stroked gently over the edges of her jaw, and he pulled away from her forehead, only just enough to let his lips push towards a kiss in lieu of words.

The goddess could feel Evan's relief at the tone of her voice, the soft openness of her demeanor, but still, his words echoed through her. She felt a tug on her essence, her shape, as though the human form she inhabited--the one she spent the most time in--was suddenly becoming uncomfortable.

She didn't quite know what to do with that information, but when Evan shifted his jaw to bring his lips closer to hers, the pull only became stronger. The moment his lips made contact with hers, she let the strange ache have agency of its own as she entirely let go of the form she inhabited and became mist--no something denser--a liquid, wine, in fact. The red fluid spiraled up into the air, a glistening array of droplets the color of blood, and remained suspended there for a moment. Then, in a slow and quiet stream, the droplets of wine, tasting almost exactly like the wine they had shared earlier, moved toward Evan, paused a moment for Evan's permission, and then pressed themselves gently against Evan's lips.

Drink of me, the goddess said, her voice echoing strongly through Evan's mind.

((OOC: I guess, full permission to take some liberties with how this feels to Evan. You can also stop at any time and we can fill in the blanks, so to speak. Essentially, this is her way of reforming a mental connection with him and merging with him, or an attempt at that at least, which could fail, although I don't immediately know what that would mean. I imagine the essence of her would feel a lot like alcohol going down, maybe burning a bit more that the original wine and spreading a lot faster through his veins. Lmk if you need more.))

Evan moaned softly as his lips pressed against the goddess', but before the elation of it could fully settle in, the feel of her dissipated, and his moan hitched up into a surprised and disappointed whine. He swallowed the sound as soon as he could, embarrassment and worry flooding over him as he opened his eyes to see what was happening. Where the goddess had been, there was now a swirl of blood droplets in the air, thick and glimmering in the fog.

For a split second, Evan felt his fight-or-flight response lighting up like fire--if there was blood in the air, there was likely to be danger--but as he watched the fluid swirl, not only was it not the right viscousness for blood, but it also moved with intention, in a pattern not wrought by violence, but by design. He relaxed, though a different sort of buzz picked up as the droplets flowed towards him. He reflexively sat back on his heels as some approached his face, but then he leaned tentatively towards them again, his will and his instincts performing a delicate dance with each other as he tried to make sense of the situation. Whatever this liquid was was the goddess, he was sure of it, even if it was difficult to fully wrap his mind around.

Droplets of the liquid gently pressed against Evan's lips, and he heard the goddess' voice--Drink of me. With relief at the confirmation of it, Evan opened his mouth, at first just enough to let a few droplets in to taste. Indeed, it wasn't blood, but wine--much like the wine she had given him before. Some dim sense of either frustration or embarrassment heated the base of his spine, that he would think of blood before wine, but it didn't seem to matter much, especially not as an amusement bloomed on top of it: that blood had been in that wine, so was it really so different, anyway?

He opened his lips wider, inviting a fuller drink into his mouth. His tongue danced with the liquid, and he searched for every taste in the liquid he could find. It burned going down his throat as he swallowed, but he didn't mind. He was growing excited as he invited another gulp of her in, hopeful that this would bring back the connection they'd lost--maybe even leave them both in the same body again. His excitement got the better of him, though, and he invited in too much, at the same time as his lungs wanted to breathe. Panic tore through him as he coughed a droplet out of the wrong pipe--coughed the goddess out of him--and apology swirled through his mind as he tried to get a handle on his body, praying that despite his mistake, he could still drink of her once he did.

((OOC: So, I coooould see this resulting in him throwing up... but, I don't think it has to? Partly I think it depends on whether she's able to give him enough space to catch his beath here... so, passing it back to you lol))

The goddess, her consciousness spread and separated among thousands of tiny droplets, could not see anything. There was only sensation, especially the sensation of the breeze against each and every one of the droplets as they held formation. She waited, having only the sensation of Evan--his surprise, his fear, his eventual understanding as to what had occurred--and as the first few droplets passed over his lips, the goddess shivered, each of the droplets trembling briefly as the first few experienced the warmth of Evan's mouth and tongue, the rush and sway of being swallowed and ushered toward his stomach, the delicious burning sensation of sliding down his throat.

As Evan opened his mouth wider, inviting a full drink of her, the droplets shivered again, and those closest to Evan rushed and pooled together. The sensations became overwhelming simultaneous--some of the goddess still out in the chill of the breeze, some of her already spreading through the blood in Evan's body and onward toward his mind, some sliding intimately down his throat. All at once, all of her wanted to be inside him and experience the closeness of being in the same body again such that the droplets coalesced too quickly and cascaded eagerly into Evan's mouth even as the man tried to catch his breath.

He coughed quickly and painfully then, all the separated awarenesses of the goddess startled and surprised by the sudden ferocity of Evan's need to expel her. She willed the whole of her to slow down. And, ultimately, the flow of fluid came to a complete stop. The ways Evan's body carried her through his circulatory system were the only movement for a span of moments.

She couldn't expect that drinking her out of thin air would be an easy or familiar experience. And, realizing that, the goddess warmed and softened. Too often, she tried to move past and even mask the parts of Evan that were so entirely and completely human. Needing to breathe, being utterly shocked and fascinated by her sudden physical change, coughing her out of him and being so totally afraid of how he might have offended her in doing so... this was real. This was substantial. He was fully and truly here with her. And that was exactly what she wanted to be a part of.

Ready? she asked gently, tenderly in the air, in Evan's mind, and tentatively allowed the remaining liquid of her to approach his lips again. His prayer that she would continue moved her, and she allowed herself to trickle into his mouth this time, slow and sensual, opening herself to all the sensations once more--so many different states of flow. And, beginning to feel herself, the wine, through Evan, she could tell she had begun to taste different. The temperature had increased somewhat, and a light chocolate and even some slight cinnamon-like taste crept in.

And wasn't this exactly what Evan had suggested? To never stop changing?

As more and more of her flowed through Evan's veins, the goddess' consciousness began to collect itself again, and before long, she could see through Evan's eyes, her thoughts loud and clear in his mind. Tentatively, she tried to move his fingers where they lay against his bare leg, tapping one finger against his leg at a time, a red bloom of bliss surrounding and swirling Evan's mind as it began to work.

((OOC: She'll stop again whenever Evan needs to breathe. And I think we made a couple assumptions, so feel free to set us straight.))

Thankfully, Evan was able to catch his breath quickly, only a faint echo of a sting lingering in the back of his throat once all was said and done. Well, that, and a sense of emptiness and longing, as he recognized that the liquid had given him space. Of course he was grateful, but he also already missed the taste of it on his tongue. When he looked a little closer, though, he realized there was a faint sensation of flowing, a memory blooming of the fantasy that had briefly stolen his attention the other night, of the goddess watching him from behind; only now, the sensation was more like within than behind, and it warmed him.

Ready? the goddess asked, the sentiment floating with the liquid in the air and tenderly reverberating within him. Yes, he replied in kind, an abstract vibration within his body, and he couldn't quite help the way his tongue eagerly brushed against the back of his lip as he opened to her again, memories spilling through him of the moment the goddess had revealed her full form at the summoning. Gods, and he'd thought her cock had been novel. Saliva pooled with savory excitement beneath his tongue as the goddess' new form trickled over his tongue, teasing him with slivers of her taste, which he realized after a moment was changing, hints of chocolate and cinnamon cresting over the rich soil and fruit. There was something nostalgic about it, another memory briefly blooming in his attention but not quite taking shape; a refuge he'd found when he was very young, comfort given him by a friendly soul. But a chain reaction followed that memory, embarrassment and melancholy coloring his nostalgia as he recalled the fantasy he'd had that fateful night in the woods, hands tenderly guiding him into a warm bed, touching his face and showing him care.

One of Evan's hands rubbed against his bare chest, and he gently closed his mouth for a moment, silently requesting a quick break from consumption. He delicately rolled the last bit of liquid that had been in his mouth around with his tongue before swallowing, and then with a rich, full breath, he nodded and welcomed the liquid in again, ready to continue. It wasn't like the goddess was seeing much she hadn't already seen before--and even if she were, Evan wanted it this time, even with the melancholy and embarrassment and whatever else may come with it. Maybe, anything he could show her could help with the storm they'd weathered--were still weathering? He felt for the goddess to see if he could check how she was, and was pleased to find that flowing sensation closer by, her attention crisp and present as she answered his silent inquiry with affirmation--she was there with him. They were joining again, and as if to prove it, the goddess tapped one of Evan's fingers lightly against his leg, sending a rush of warm excitement dancing up through his hips. The thought bloomed to answer the gesture--perhaps do something playful with the hand that currently still pressed against his chest--but for now he opted to focus on drinking, eager to invite every last drop of the goddess in.

The goddess felt Evan press his tongue to the inside of his lip, salivating once he had fully collected himself. He wanted this. He wanted her. And she wanted nothing less. As droplets of her awareness flowed steadily into Evan's mouth once more, she felt his view of her from the original summoning bloom in his mind and felt, too, the salivation he had experienced at her reveal then. And he was experiencing so much more awe of her now. Gods, it was impossible to deny that she liked the effect she had on him. Where the response to her own compulsion in others pushed her away, the intensity with which Evan beckoned her in turn was intoxicating, and she did not in any way want to back away from it.

And so, they flowed. Their consciousnesses pooling within the same body, her awareness flowing through his veins across his body in all possible directions. She unconsciously warmed the blood in his body, willing it to speed up such that she could feel the whole of herself collected within him again. Everything felt... cozy. Seductively comfortable, even. Still, a distant part of her kept some attention on Evan's reflexes and desires, responding immediately with a pause when he closed his mouth. She understood, hearing the decision in his mind and his body before it happened. There was not much left of her outside his body, and when only a couple swallows remained, the goddess could not help the way she rushed into Evan's mouth, hungrily and happily, bursting with a tenderness she could not fully explain. Gods, she wanted this. She wanted this, and she was ever grateful she trusted to impulse to dissipate when Evan told her to change.

She felt the warm and excitement rush through Evan's blood at the sensation of her having control even over something as minute as his fingers, and she could feel his mind sorting through ways to play with her right back. First, she wanted to be whole within him again.

At first, when there seemed to be no more liquid in the air to drink, Evan felt disappointed, but he reminded himself as he licked his lips and swallowed the last remaining bit in his mouth that it only meant that the goddess was fully within him, rather than that there was no more of her to be had. His heart raced with a thrill in his chest, his body warm even beneath the chill in the air as his blood rushed through him, thick with the goddess he'd consumed.

De...

The thought was faint, a side-effect of an intention as he simultaneously celebrated what he and the goddess had just done and reached for her presence within him. He realized what he'd done, though, and smirked, deciding it was time to follow through on his previous impulse.

Dehal...

He savored this thought more purposefully as the hand on his chest took its palm off of his skin, instead trailing fingertips to the side just beneath his collarbone, a gentle echo of the way he'd touched himself in the summoning circle. Then, he reached across to his opposite shoulder, biting nails into his skin there and raking them over his chest, eager both for the burning sting itself and also to feel the goddess' response to it, especially as he languidly pulled the rest of her name through his mind.

Dehaljadrun...

As the wine of the goddess made its way through Evan's veins, her presence became ever more palpable--a fullness within Evan, filling and fulfilling a loneliness, an emptiness they had both had since they had done this the last time. The goddess felt electric within Evan, the current of her humming and buzzing pleasantly as Evan licked his lips, and she felt his tongue as though it were her own, sliding across her own lips. Gods, sharing a body. Evan's body felt suddenly like an offering to both of them, a playground where anything and everything was possible, where they could feel anything the other did without any interference or delay.

Hungrily, the goddess anticipated her next move, but before she could fully form the thought, she heard the first syllable of her name echo through their shared mindspace.

De...

Uncontrollably, the goddess caused intense shivers through Evan's body, wracking him with waves of delight and pleasure. Nothing could possibly have comforted her more than being so thoroughly entwined with Evan this way. She felt held and honored and invited, and though each of their mergers had been delightful, this one had a fuller bodied sensation, a completeness that she wasn't sure they had reached before. It was a distracting and intoxicating joy that radiated through both of them.

Dehal...

This second syllable came with a solidified intention from Evan has he took control of one of his hands, which rested on his chest, and traced his fingers along his collarbone. The tingles and shivers returned, the goddess writhed within Evan as pleasure tore up Evan's spine from his hips, into his neck and across his shoulder. It was almost more pleasure than she thought a human could bear, but it felt inexplicably right, and she was not afraid.

Watching Evan touch himself like this had so thoroughly intrigued the goddess at the summoning, but it was nothing compared to being inside the body experiencing the sensation. But then, Evan reached toward his opposite shoulder, and his nails bit down into his skin as he moved across the naked flesh. At first, the goddess was startled, but that was quickly swept away by Evan's own craving to feel the burning sting and offer it to her, which she accepted readily, guiding Evan's fingernails to dig just a little deeper such that the two of their intentions moved the body in tandem, in harmony. They both wanted this same sensation, and the craving, the longing for the intensity of their connection flooded through them both and the body.

With relish, Evan summoned the rest of the goddess's name, and it echoed in the only space between them.

Dehaljadrun...

Evan's spine arched dramatically as a rolling peak of pleasure traveled up Evan's spine again, this time pushing up and out of the top of Evan's head. Colors erupted behind their eyes, red and purple, swirling golds, and a soft, creamy white. Without thinking, the goddess moved Evan's other hand up his stomach and chest until it grasped gently around Evan's throat, and his head fell back to welcome it. The goddess squeezed there subtly, pleasantly, drawing out the pulses of pleasure moving up Evan's spine. He was truly feeling how she felt when he said her name. He was feeling it as though he were her, and she was nearly moved to tears with how beautiful and divine it was to share the experience. Craving continued to wrack her, and she wrested control of Evan's legs, clumsily shifting their balance such that Evan's fell flat on his back, his hands still doing their work across his skin. She squeezed against his throat a little more tightly now, one of his feet stroking up and down the calf of his other leg.

Evan's body hummed and shivered with pleasure - with the goddess' pleasure, which he shared in completely. Joy and pride pulsed through him, satisfaction blooming everywhere that his fingers caressed. He knew so wholly how much she relished him, the way he had touched himself at the summoning, and the way that he touched himself now. Pleasure tore through him, arching his spine and propelling his hips into the air with elation. He wasn't sure he'd ever felt so beloved, and the satisfaction of it might have coursed through him like a climax, if he hadn't stubbornly tensed his body as though to slow it, relishing himself the friction of holding something back.

He savored the goddess' surprised when he dug his nails into his skin, but she quickly melted into the sensation with him, coaxing his nails yet deeper, and a pleasurable groan hummed through his throat as Evan himself melted into the sensation.

When he finally summoned her full name, already awash with awe and affection and elation, a languorous explosion of pleasure erupted through his body, arching his spine again and this time escaping out the top of his head, far too powerful for him to hold back even if he'd wanted. It almost felt like falling through the river, feeling the light-water rushing and shimmering by. Colors danced behind his eyes, and he felt the goddess marveling with him. His hand followed the flow, caressing from his thigh up his stomach, over his chest, closing around his throat as his head rolled back, welcoming the touch with a blissful groan. His fingers squeezed subtly, highlighting the pulse of his blood through his body, pleasantly thumping like a drumbeat beneath the melodic echo of the goddess' name.

The goddess shifted his legs with an intention he didn't fully understand, but to be fair, he didn't necessarily care to; he was plenty content in the flow he was in, his focus on the caress of one hand, tracing back over the pleasant burn of the trails it had left across his chest, and the pressure of the other, holding him hovering in a space between blissful and alert, and flooding him with elation to be there. When his back hit the ground, all he really felt was the memory of his scale gently rolling across the grass, and with it a vibrant bloom of trust. He did feel more aware of his legs now that they were freed from the task of holding him up, and he moaned freely as one leg bent to caress the other, the inside of his heel stroking languorously up and down his calf. The sound of his pleasure was only interrupted by the hand around his throat tightening its grip, and he smiled, the motion gently bringing some awareness to the fact that tears had at some point spilled onto his cheeks. He was happy. Whatever else had transpired between the goddess and him, they had made it here, to this moment of flow and elation and bliss, and he would do it all again in a heartbeat.

I am yours.

The words floated through their shared consciousness, carrying with them twirling and glistening lights of affection and awe, elation and invitation. The fingers around his throat tightened again, and Evan's consciousness joyously rode the fresh wave of alertness that danced through his body. His lungs were starting to feel like great, empty caves, plush curtains of dizziness draping their majestic caverns. If any thought bloomed of tangible fear, it was easily overpowered by a sensation of knowing that warmed his stomach, and assured him that they had well and truly earned this chance to trust themselves, and each other. He let go of a vigilance he hadn't realized had still been holding tight in his chest, and relief washed over him like a waterfall, sending a powerful shudder of pleasure and bliss through the whole of him.

The goddess tangled and entwined with Evan, drinking in every one of his sensations, his bliss so thoroughly palpable within the shared body. Slowly, the goddess noticed that the colors behind their eyes began to fade, and she recognized that Evan was pressing his own fingers even more intently around his neck than she had, each blissful wave coursing through them an excuse for a deepening. Their shared lungs ached for air, and the goddess remembered potently how she had hungrily pushed Evan under the water at the hot pools. She had barely recognized his need for air then, her own needs far too demanding to listen to anything else, but now she felt the cavernous sensation of his lungs and their pleading as though they were her own. But, this time, unlike at the hot pools, the impulse followed an uncomplicated, divine pleasure. Evan wanted this, all of this, all of her.

Maybe too much of her.

I am yours, Evan said with relish in their shared consciousness, and she knew it to be true. Crashing waves of gratitude and awe as well as trepidation and longing swept through the goddess' mind, and she knew Evan could feel her emotions. She wanted him--she wanted to suffocate him, to shake the pleasure from every tiny corner of his body until everything in him burst or changed--death, she supposed. Why did she crave that so fervently, that edge before death?

Some urge toward frustration tugged at the farthest reaches of her awareness. Why must she always hold herself back? Wasn't all this what she was made for? Made of? But, she softened instead, coaxing all Evan's blood vessels to open wider and allow yet more blood flow. She wanted him healthy, wanted to feel his blood circulating and cleansing him. She wanted him to be able to withstand as much of her as physically possible.

Taking gentle control over Evan's fingers, she forced them to release and relax. She decided not to force the body to take a breath--it would do that on its own eventually. But, she did begin to hum quietly in their shared mindspace, the tune a lilting lover's lament that suddenly sprang from her memory. It was comforting, in its quietly eerie way.

She kept using one of Evan's legs to caress the other, a little more absentmindedly now, the chill of the misty air as it rushed against Evan's skin settling fully into the goddess' awareness.

There's no one I want more than you, the goddess finally said, her words carefully chosen and full of fervor, once her humming had faded to silence. But I am constantly a danger to you. She shifted her awareness within Evan slightly as though to draw back and away from him, but the ache from doing so was too great, so she settled in again, enveloping and caressing him inside himself.

A memory from the goddess' past threatened to emerge and passed over their shared consciousness like a dark cloud, but the goddess kept it from fully taking shape where Evan could see, a subtle embarrassment coloring their shared awareness.

((OOC: We are imagining that Evan can see pretty much all her thoughts right now, though they are probably happening very fast. If he pried, he could probably see what she's trying to hide, but that's an option and not a requirement. She's thinking about having agreed to give Rorrim some of her godhood and prolonging his life. I imagine that part of the reason she did that was because she didn't want to feel like she could seriously hurt him anymore. Happy to go into it more in my next post if Evan decides to be nosy.))