Written Wonderland

That Nick squeezed Rav's hand soon after made Rav feel better. The slack feeling was gone, and Nick even smiled at Rav a little.

"I can definitely tell that you're making an effort," Nick said. "I'm really grateful you're willing to talk this all through. It means a lot." Rav let out a pent-up breath, glad that he was doing that much right.

Then, Nick pressed the top of his head into Rav's shoulder, coupled with a hand squeeze. Rav wasn't fully sure what to make of the gesture, but it made a warm, contented feeling brew in his stomach. When Nick straightened, his smile was somewhat embarrassed but fully adorable.

Rav thought that Nick might say more, but it seemed he preferred to be non-verbal for a while. They were reaching the point where they needed to decide whether to head back to Nick's place or make another loop, and Rav gently steered them toward making another loop to give them some spaciousness. There was no need to be in a hurry. Nick leaned against Rav's arm again, resting the side of his head there this time. Rav thought a woman walking toward them on the same path probably took notice, and Rav stiffened a little, but he also felt some sort of pride in his stomach. Yes, he thought, Look. This man trusts me enough to lay his head on me.

And, besides, Nick didn't stay that way for long, only a few paces, though he caressed the back of Rav's knuckle to make up for the lessened contact.

"I think the fairness thing makes a lot of sense," Nick finally said, bringing Rav back into the world of language. "Maybe that's something we can check in about before deciding on an agreement. Does it feel fair? I know you said it's not my job to be clear, and that you didn't necessarily condone the fairness thing, but... we're both working on things, here, and I genuinely think it might be a good check-in prompt."

Rav thought Nick might be finished, but Rav was content to roll that thought around in his mind either way. Eventually, Nick added, "I guess, maybe... I'll try not to take responsibility for making sure that happens. But, like... just like it's not your responsibility to make sure I check in with myself. But we can prompt each other if we think about it." And then Nick grinned, sending a flurry of sparks through Rav's stomach, which were only amplified when Nick squeezed his hand yet again. Dear gods, Rav might need to pull his hand away just on account of the intensity at this point.

After a moment of thought, he did pull his hand out from Nick's, but he walked behind and around Nick to grasp his other hand instead. His finger nerves on that side could use a bit of a break.

The switch-up also gave him a moment to think. Everything Nick said was more than reasonable, and Rav felt very cared for, but not in a way that made him think Nick was ignoring himself. They were both genuinely caring for each other and themselves in this interaction and the ways they were planning future interactions. Future interactions, Rav thought, but of course. This only mattered if they both had intentions to continue interacting. Rav smiled just a little smugly at that, tossing Nick a wry, sidelong smirk.

Composing himself, Rav felt like he needed another recap, "So, if we were going to make a list to set a boundary or do something... intimate, we might ask questions like, are we going slow? does this feel fair? and did we each check in with ourselves? Does that sound about right?"

Nick wasn't sure what reaction he'd expected from Rav--he hadn't thought he'd expected anything in particular--but Rav pulling his hand away and walking around to the other side of Nick was not what he'd expected. He blinked at Rav with some confusion, but before he fully missed the touch, Rav was lacing his and Nick's other hands together. A soft, tiny little giggle bubbled up from Nick's chest, an unexpected delight tingling through him at this turn of events. Then, all at once, Rav tossed Nick a smug, sidelong smirk, and a small cascade of giggles bubbled up that time. His cheeks grew warm, too, somehow too warm to keep looking at Rav, and so his gaze shifted directly forward, a surely ridiculous grin on his face.

"So, if we were going to make a list to set a boundary or do something... intimate," Rav sank back into the conversation, and Nick squeezed his hand tight, perhaps trying to ground himself with the touch. "...we might ask questions like, are we going slow? does this feel fair? and did we each check in with ourselves? Does that sound about right?"

Nick started to nod, but slowed himself, instead bringing his free hand up to his mouth in thought as he double-checked whether he had truly taking in Rav's words. Are we going slow? Nick smiled under his hand; well, yes, he'd just slowed himself down! Does this feel fair? His eyes flicked to Rav, perhaps checking in on the man's expression; or, maybe just considering Rav's point of view generally, and it made sense to look at Rav while he did. Although, Nick's own expression gained a gentle consternation as he realized that he should probably be considering himself, first. With a slow, deep breath, Nick closed his eyes and set his free hand on his chest, trying to pay attention to how the question of fairness felt in his body. He felt open, ever-so-slightly abuzz with giddiness. His expression relaxed, content that he'd redirected himself successfully. Yes, it seemed like this was all sounding perfectly fair to him, and -- bonus -- he had indeed checked in with himself now!

Some embarrassment did bloom as he brought his attention back to Rav--would Rav find it tedious, waiting for Nick to check in with himself like that? It did feel a little bit silly that Nick should have to go through things so slowly. Nick sighed a little, shaking his head and squeezing Rav's hand to try to ground himself before finally smiling a little sheepishly to Rav.

"Yeah, that all sounds good to me. ... I'm feeling a little anxious about being tedious, though." Nick squeezed Rav's hand again. "How are you feeling?"

Holding Nick's hand on the other side had been the right call. Now, Rav could work some of the nervous energy out of his other hand while continuing to feel squeezes from Nick. Rav tossed a glance Nick's direction and saw him begin to nod, but Nick paused and instead brought his other hand to his mouth in thought, smiling.

Nick's eyes then flicked to Rav nervously, and Rav immediately turned to look straight ahead, trying not to put undue pressure on him. He would need to be patient with their check-ins--that was part of this agreement. Rav thought... he could do that. He could do this. It was going to take some practice, but... it was... nice, actually. And maybe it would give him a kind of certainty that he had never had during intimate interactions. A subtle smile returned to his lips.

When Nick sighed, Rav returned his gaze to Nick. Nick shook his head, squeezing Rav's hand once more with that shy smile of his.

"Yeah, that all sounds good to me," Nick said, and Rav immediately heard the "but" coming once more, trying not to let its imminence take too much of the wind out of his sails. "I'm feeling a little anxious about being tedious, though." Nick squeezed Rav's hand again. "How are you feeling?"

Rav almost laughed out of relief, but he managed to only crack a slightly wider smile. Stretching his lips a little to regain composure, he said, "I mean, it'll take some getting used to, but I think it will get easier and more natural. And, it's all... soft. No cliffs to fall off. Just... each of us being curious about ourselves and each other without strict requirements."

Rav's smile widened in what looked like amusement, which Nick hoped was a good sign. It felt like a good sign, in the way that his body relaxed in response. Though, then Rav did something to the smile--pulling it tighter, trying to control it maybe--and a little bit of tentative nervousness stuck around in Nick, waiting to see what that expression meant.

"I mean, it'll take some getting used to," Rav said, "but I think it will get easier and more natural. And, it's all... soft. No cliffs to fall off. Just... each of us being curious about ourselves and each other without strict requirements."

Nick nodded, a little bit of uncertainty still lingering while he went over the words again in his mind. It'll take some getting used to--that was the part that Nick was still anxious about. It was hard to listen past that. Rav had said something about soft, though. Nick exhaled and leaned his shoulder against Rav's, seeking a little extra comfort. He let go of trying to parse out all of Rav's words, and instead tried to pay attention to the man's body--no, wait. He shifted attention into his own body, and let out a long sigh. What he found was a bit of tiredness, a longing to get cozy. He contented himself with leaning his head against Rav's shoulder and offering another gentle squeeze of his hand. Thus resourced, he found a little bit of bravery, and shifted his weight back over his own feet.

"So... what's something you're curious about right now?"

Rav thought he had come up with a reasonable response--one that was both true and something he thought would put Nick at ease--but it didn't appear to have the desired effect. Though Nick nodded, he seemed distant to Rav. Still, Nick leaned in close, and it was almost possible to feel the warmth echoing even through Rav's thick jacket.

Nick let out a long sigh, his eyes closed, and Rav gently steered them back in the direction of the house rather than making another loop. Perhaps they were both getting tired, or at least, tired of being in this setting this way.

Rav began wondering if he should follow up his statements with a clarification when Nick pulled his weight from Rav and said, "So... what's something you're curious about right now?"

That was... open ended. Rav furrowed his brows and pulled his lips together in concentration. He had the urge to say something that might make Nick laugh, but he was afraid it might not land properly, so he quickly dismissed that idea. What else?

He could say he was curious about what would happen when they got back to Nick's house.

He could say he was curious about what part of his previous statement hadn't landed well.

He could say he was curious about what Nick thought about Rav seeing someone who was--in some definitions--a prostitute.

But what was wholly true to this moment? Not the future, not the past, not 10 minutes from now when Rav would find out whether Nick had changed his mind about actually inviting him back in. Now.

Rav looked around, searching for something to say. Did he really not have curiosity?

Finally dropping rules and pretenses altogether and just searching for something that seemed fun, Rav asked, "What... uh... what first caught your attention about me? What did you think when we first met?"

Rav furrowed his brow, his expression serious in thought. Nick worried a little that it was too broad a question--was he just shunting something off on Rav, asking him to find the next thing?

Well, maybe while Rav looked for what to say, Nick could reflect on his own question. Rav had shared so much earlier, about art in the desert at night and sitting in trees and carving wood. He shivered pleasantly, remembering the fantasy that Rav had shared about kissing behind Nick's ear while they carved, though he sobered as that gestured him back toward the bathroom. There had been valuable moments there, but it was tiring, and Nick wanted to figure out how to relax for a while. Maybe something they had talked about back at the house... he remembered Rav mentioning videogames, maybe...

"What... uh..." Rav spoke up, and Nick brought his attention back to the man, eager to hear where his own curiosities lay at the moment. "What first caught your attention about me? What did you think when we first met?"

Nick felt his cheeks grow warm, his smile widening to absurdity as he blinked away.

"I mean, you were... welcoming, like I said at the cafe..." He chanced a brief, crooked grin at Rav as he playfully bumped their hips together. "I know it was your job and all, but... I don't know. I liked the way you looked at me. It seemed like just a fantasy at the time, that it was anything more than just professional attentiveness, I guess, but... then you left that note at the cafe..."

Nick squeezed Rav's hand gently, offering another brief sidelong smile, though a sense of awkwardness started to bloom. He liked the way that Rav looked at him? He could imagine Rav receiving that a little, like, that's it? And of course, that wasn't it, but embarassment burned at Nick's cheeks as he tried to summon the courage to share more. He tilted his head a little as he looked down at the path, unable to meet Rav's gaze for this.

"You have this like... sharp twinkle in your expression?" Nick let out a small huff of a laugh at that, shaking his head a little at himself. "It makes me feel curious... what you're thinking about, what's catching your eye." He nibbled his lip gently, then, and finally managed a flicker of a gaze up to Rav's eyes.

"So... what caught your eye about me?"

Rav glimpsed Nick out of his peripherals, seeing that Nick's smile almost became too much for his face.

"I mean, you were... welcoming, like I said at the cafe..." Nick bumped his hip against Rav's playfully--was Rav milking this too much? But he did like hearing Nick talk about it. "I know it was your job and all, but... I don't know. I liked the way you looked at me. It seemed like just a fantasy at the time, that it was not anything more than just professional attentiveness, I guess, but... then you left that note at the cafe..."

Nick squeezed Rav's hand, and Rav looked over at Nick, though he had turned away. Had Rav been hoping for more? Perhaps not. It wasn't as though anything [i]magical[/i] had happened when Rav had drawn Nick's blood.

But Nick kept talking.

"You have this like... sharp twinkle in your expression?" Nick laughed lightly, and Rav felt a grin forming on his face. "It makes me feel curious... what you're thinking about, what's catching your eye."

[i]Well, I do put needles in people for a living,[/i] Rav thought.

Nick nibbled his lip and looked at Rav, coaxing Rav to meet Nick's gaze. He imagined that sharpness Nick was talking about was there now--a little hungry, a little dangerous, and definitely daring.

"So... what caught your eye about me?"

Maybe it felt a little like a cop out to for Nick to reflect the question. After all, Nick had made Rav squirm for something new to be curious about, but Rav found himself excited to answer the question.

"I mean, I like feeling competent. I like going through the motions and talking someone through everything while they're... on the edge of a knife. I like the opportunity to... show off a little, I guess. I liked the quiet building anticipation that you [i]might[/i] faint but that it was feasible for me to prevent it, maybe. But if you did faint, it wouldn't have been my fault. Low stakes adrenaline. Good practice with being calm under pressure."

Rav paused for a moment, realizing that wasn't exactly [i]specific[/i] to Nick.

"So that was a good backdrop for your blushy smile and the way you can't hardly meet my eyes for more than a few seconds. There's an intense curiosity and hopefulness in your eyes when you do, though. I enjoyed letting my sharpness show a little extra just to see the effect it would have. And, I thought that would be that, bandage you up and probably never see you again. Except, I [i]did[/i]," Rav said, offering a wolfish smile as he leaned toward Nick and pulled their hands close to his own chest for a moment before letting them fall gently between them again.

Sobering a little, Rav looked ahead and said, "I wanted to try dating again but just hadn't made any effort that direction. I guess I wanted something to happen naturally. Dating apps... it's just weird. But I didn't know if you... I mean not everyone is..." Rav gestured awkwardly between them, "...homocurious?"

Wow, he was being ridiculous.

"I didn't think you'd take me up on it. But then, you took so well to contact improv, and I actually enjoyed myself with you, like, it was easy and fun and exhilarating to be out of breath with you and..." Rav paused, not sure how to finished his monologue.

"...yeah," Rav said anticlimactically.

A thrill twirled and danced down into Nick's gut as he met Rav's eyes, that sharp twinkle sparkling through.

"I mean, I like feeling competent," Rav said. "I like going through the motions and talking someone through everything while they're... on the edge of a knife." Another twirling dance of thrill and excitement joined the first in Nick's gut, and he squeezed Rav's hand tight, almost feeling dizzy for a blink.

"I like the opportunity," Rav continued, "to... show off a little, I guess. I liked the quiet building anticipation that you might faint but that it was feasible for me to prevent it, maybe. But if you did faint, it wouldn't have been my fault. Low stakes adrenaline. Good practice with being calm under pressure."

Nick let out a soft, breathy giggle, enjoying the scene Rav was painting. Not so much a clear visual, but a smooth, sensual [i]feeling[/i], maybe like translucent curtains blowing in a gentle breeze--with a subtle, growing buzz adding just a little friction, a building heat. Nick swayed a little against Rav's shoulder, offering his hand another light squeeze.

"So that was a good backdrop for your blushy smile and the way you can't hardly meet my eyes for more than a few seconds."

Another breathy giggle escaped Nick's mouth, this one a little bit louder and higher-pitched. He leaned more deliberately against Rav, nuzzling his forehead against the man's arm. He felt like he must be [i]beaming[/i] warmth, which sparked another mildly dizzying dance in his body, this one of embarassment and nervous, elated glee in his chest.

"There's an intense curiosity and hopefulness in your eyes when you do, though," Rav [i]kept going[/i]. For a moment, Nick worried he might somehow explode, but he breathed through it and stood upright again, somehow mustering the resolve to look at Rav again, maybe summon some of that [i]intense curiosity[/i] the man was admiring. "I enjoyed letting my sharpness show a little extra just to see the effect it would have. And, I thought that would be that, bandage you up and probably never see you again. Except, I [i]did.[/i]"

Rav turned a wolfish smile to Nick, challenging his freshly-mustered composure. His cheeks were beet-red, he was sure, but somehow, he managed to hold Rav's gaze, his smile beaming ear to ear with delight. Rav pulled their hands close to his chest, and something about the gesture was soothing, smoothing out the jittery buzzing excitement in him, just a little, to allow some smooth, serene curtains to blow in a sweet warm breeze.

But then, as he let their hands return to their sides, Rav took on a bit more of a sober expression. Nick wondered where the wolfishness had retreated to, and why, but he resolved to be patient, though he couldn't help feeling just a little bit sad when Rav looked ahead down the path. Still, Nick respectfully shifted his gaze that direction as well, though he did offer Rav's hand a gentle squeeze.

"I wanted to try dating again," Rav continued, and Nick listened intently while his eyes took in the landscape they moved through, "but just hadn't made any effort that direction. I guess I wanted something to happen naturally. Dating apps... it's just weird. But I didn't know if you... I mean not everyone is..." Rav gestured awkwardly between them, "...homocurious?"

That prompted another small, breathy giggle, though there was a small shade of nervousness to it.

"I didn't think you'd take me up on it. But then, you took so well to contact improv, and I actually enjoyed myself with you, like, it was easy and fun and exhilarating to be out of breath with you and..." Rav paused, and then finally tacked on, "...yeah."

Nick took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, [i]pretty sure[/i] that that was a cue that Rav was ready to be done talking. Nick felt an urge toward filling the space with something reassuring, but he noticed the urgency in that and tried to let go of that, first. He rolled over the last things that Rav had said, enjoying imagining the moments when Rav was nervous about whether Nick would take him up on that first invitation; when they were both out of breath while dancing, at the time still unsure how much they both shared in the ease and thrill and excitement of it. And now, they were here holding hands.

Nick squeezed Rav's hand twice, grounding himself in the moment.

"I'm [i]really happy[/i] that we're here holding hands right now." He said, offering just something that was true and present and alive. "And, I have really, really enjoyed dancing with you. In class, and at my place earlier. I feel a bit daring around you, and it's really exciting."

He'd started to speed up his words a little near the end of that, and he noticed that the breath he drew in preparing to speak more felt a little bit rushed. He let it out without saying anything, letting a serenity settle into his body. Then, underneath that, he found the grain of nervousness buzzing away in his chest: [i]homocurious[/i]. Nick had been surprised, especially after the bathroom--Rav had seemed so confident in wanting to do some pretty charged things with Nick--but, was he entirely on board with Nick being a boy?

Nick wanted to ask if [i]homocurious[/i] was how Rav identified, but it felt like too pointed a question. And besides, Rav had just talked a lot--he might appreciate a little bit of a break.

"I've pretty much always identified as bisexual," Nick said after a nice full breath, making sure not to rush through his words. He tried to hold onto the feeling of serenity, even as that little anxious grain kept buzzing away in his chest. He wasn't sure he could really assuage it right now; he just had to let it keep being nervous. But that didn't mean he had to rush.

"But, I haven't... " Gosh, a million little memories all vied for his attention all at once, maybe trying to refute what he'd been about to say. Undeniable moments of connection, however awkward or contextual or fleeting. Still... something had always been missing. Maybe in himself, too. He got a little bit sad, but kept a serene smile on his face.

"I guess that was another reason it seemed like just a fantasy, that you [i]might[/i] have been doing [i]anything resembling[/i] flirting at the blood draw. I don't think it would have been the first time I..." He shook his head, sighing a little. No, whatever he'd been about to say, that didn't feel right either. He was starting to feel anxious, starting and stopping multiple different thoughts--was Rav getting bored, or frustrated? What was Nick actually trying to get to, here?

"I was.... beyond elated, when you said you were attracted to me, after that class." There was a temptation to add some claim about that being a first time a boy had said so, but his memories offered up counter-examples again, albeit maybe not in quite the same terms. Maybe he hadn't been able to receive it before. Or maybe there really were a million other things getting in the way. Maybe those things weren't different, exactly.

Nick sighed and shook his head again, and finally shifted his gaze toward Rav, craving some kind of read on how all that had landed.

Rav was stupid grateful that he and Nick were holding hands. As much as it made him feel exposed, as much as it made him feel childish and needy, he was so damn grateful to get in-the-moment feedback about how Nick was feeling. Each squeeze of his hand settled Rav's anxiety just a little further, his heartbeat slowed by measured amounts.

Both Rav and Nick took a deep breath at the same time, and Rav thought Nick would respond, but he didn't. Not immediately, at least.

But Nick did squeeze Rav's hand. Twice.

"I'm really happy that we're here holding hands right now," Nick said, and Rav's chest bloomed with happiness. At least that feeling was assuredly mutual. "And, I have really, really enjoyed dancing with you. In class, and at my place earlier. I feel a bit daring around you, and it's really exciting." Daring, Rav liked the sound of that.

Here again, though, there was the heaviness of a lead-up toward a contradiction. Would there always be a "but"? Rav wondered.

There was a long silence before Nick said, "I've pretty much always identified as bisexual, but I haven't..." Nick paused, and Rav grew incredibly curious. "I guess that was another reason it seemed like just a fantasy, that you might have been doing anything resembling flirting at the blood draw. I don't think it would have been the first time I..." Nick trailed off, and Rav found himself burning with a desire to know Nick's sexual history. He wanted to pry, thoroughly and deeply, asking all kinds of intimate and possibly inappropriate questions. Rav found the urge a little bizarre and tried to settle whatever sharpness had surely appeared in his eyes at the thought.

"I was.... beyond elated, when you said you were attracted to me, after that class." Nick sighed and shook his head, though he quickly returned his eyes to Rav, who had mostly tamed his impulse by then. But, in the silence with the anticipation of response between them, it flared again, and a potent imagination--of Rav on top of Nick in bed, biting the place where his ear met his jaw, and asking Nick question after playful question about what Nick had done sexually--overtook him momentarily, and Rav stopped walking altogether, his mouth open slightly as he stared ahead of them in disbelief.

Quickly, though, he squeezed Nick's hand and began walking again, having only paused for a second or two, shaking his head to try to clear the fantasy.

"I didn't want to assume how you identify. I figured 'homocurious' was... safe?" Rav said, trying to find comfort in the most matter-of-fact thing he had to say, bringing him back into this moment, beginning to exit the park.

But the sharpness still came back quickly, and Rav's smile twisted up playfully as he said, "I'm elated that you're elated." There were definitely large butterflies in Rav's stomach now. He had to remind himself of what they had talked about. Check in with yourself. Check in with Nick. Go slow. Make sure it feels fair.

Yeah, that's a manageable list, Rav thought giddily with blood pounding through his ears.

The conversation was feeling easier, more natural. Rav found there were obvious threads to follow, and he appreciated that.

"I don't have a lot of experience with... either, I guess. Although..." Oh, gods, how was he going to tell Nick about Hannah? Would he have to end things with Hannah? The thought made something turn sour in his stomach. Why hadn't he thought about this already?

He didn't have to go there right now. Maybe Nick would have a burning curiosity of his own. Rav smirked.

"Before things went... awry... I'd messed around a little with a friend, so I knew I wasn't straight. I mean, damn, it was exhilarating." Rav laughed a little and paused for just a moment before continuing. "Now, I guess I feel a little bit more afraid of myself around women because of... what happened. Which I know is... problematic. I'm working on it." With a prostitute, Rav added in his head unhelpfully. He looked at Nick with raised eyebrows, hoping he hadn't completely ruined the moment. He still felt butterflies in his own stomach, and he wasn't shutting down, so he hoped that was a good sign.

Rav stopped walking, and the anxiety in Nick's chest buzzed more loudly as he stopped alongside Rav. They were still holding hands, but Rav's expression looked a little bit distant, almost stunned. Was it something Nick had said? His mind almost began to go back through his own words, questioning whether he had said anything shocking, but he stopped himself, grounding in the touch of their hands and the fact that Rav was looking elsewhere, perhaps struck by another thought entirely. Nick swallowed, trying to keep his nerves steady and keep being patient.

Nick was rewarded with a squeeze from Rav's hand, and they began walking again, Rav shaking his head, perhaps trying to dispel whatever had seized his attention. Nick was desperately curious about what it had been, but he let it go. There was so much they would have to be patient to learn about each other. That had to be okay.

"I didn't want to assume how you identify," Rav said. "I figured 'homocurious' was... safe?"

Nick smiled, letting out a small, soft breath of a laugh, a little bit of relief settling into his chest, though a small buzz did still remain. Then, he could swear Rav's eyes got sharp again, his smile growing playful as he said, "I'm elated that you're elated." Nick's smile widened to absurdity again, his gaze drifting shyly to one side as a wave of giddiness passed through him.

"I don't have a lot of experience with... either, I guess. Although..." Nick drew his gaze back to Rav, cheeks warm and eyes full of curiosity. It seemed like a thought was starting to take Rav's attention away, though, and Nick swallowed. Thankfully, Rav's smile rebrightened into a smirk and he continued smoothly. "Before things went... awry... I'd messed around a little with a friend, so I knew I wasn't straight. I mean, damn, it was exhilarating."

Nick felt a thrill pass through his gut like the first drop of a roller coaster, and he squeezed Rav's hand again as he rode the sensation out. He let out a big breath on the other side of it, his smile still plastered ear to ear.

"Yeah, I guess I've... messed around, basically. With boys. I have..." Gosh, even his ears felt hot all of a sudden, his eyes drifting away again, this time with a little bit of a sway to his whole body, though his hand in Rav's held tight. "Well, there have been a couple girls."

Although, he found himself wondering only then what might constitute 'messing around' vs... whatever else, in Rav's mind. Or even his own, honestly. Every time he tried to draw a line, it got a little blurry. He wanted to ask, and to share, to explore, but maybe that was veering toward strange conversation to have on the street? They were exiting the park, leaving the trees behind them. There was a natural pause as they approached the crosswalk, the call to check both ways for traffic before crossing. It was getting late, though, and this street wasn't all that busy. On the other side was the block-and-some-change back home, fairly dark in-between street lights, the school's fence lining the way. It looked a little bit ominous, somehow, and Nick's stomach did a little flip. It wasn't altogether unpleasant, though. He was happy to keep walking with Rav, to keep holding the man's hand. Maybe a heaviness was starting to set in about what would happen when they got home. Could he and Rav keep talking? Would Rav be ready to head home himself? Nick squeezed Rav's hand, leaning gently against Rav's shoulder, feeling a little clingy on this last stretch.