Written Wonderland

"Unfortunately, that is missing as well," Captain Fujiwara said, and the commander did her best not to pay much attention to the way Lance was scrabbling for his clothes behind her. The excruciating and embarrassing absurdity of the situation they were all presently in should have added some levity, but Mizu was angry, visible in the set of her jaw. Was it not possible for her to have one night--one night--to herself? But, no, she was the commander, and she had taken on this responsibility willingly. All actions had consequences... and this one? She wasn't sure she would ever live it down.

Remembering herself, she began strapping on her vambraces, trying to think of what to do next. If the prince was gone along with the guard inside the tent with him, there was likely not any immediate threat. And based on the fact that the camp did not sound particularly roused beyond the tent, there weren't other threats at present. Unless Ponderance wasn't the only one silently taken from their tent?

Gods, she desperately wished they had not decided to give the goddess the communicator.

If only the prince was missing, could they keep that a secret? The commander worried about how that would affect morale, especially the evening before they sent ten volunteers to a goddess many of the them didn't fully believe in. So much for making the prince a guest of honor.

Having finished strapping on her vambraces, she moved onto the straps of her greaves.

"I don't see any way to keep this a secret," the commander finally said, albeit quietly, still bent over toward one ankle. Maybe it was best to come clean entirely. In fact, maybe it would best to tell everyone that Ponderance was the goddess' son. Hell, maybe they could even claim to have given Ponderance back to the goddess as a gesture of good faith. It was tempting. But Mizu didn't want to make a decision on that front without consulting both Captain Rutliff and Captain Kade.

Standing up straight, she looked to Fujiwara and said, "Stay alert but calm. Keep an ear to the ground about any similar disappearances. I'll walk the perimeter. Come find me immediately if you discover anything else amiss."

Fujiwara nodded and waited to see if the commander had anything else to say. When Mizu didn't, Yukiko began to walk toward the tent flap. Only then did the commander speak up.

"Yukiko," Mizu said, her impulse to connect with the captain on a personal level overpowering her interest in formality. "From the sounds of it, there's nothing you could have done." The commander let a long pause stand, looking at the captain directly. "You've acted admirably." Unlike me, Mizu thought bitterly.

Mizu spared a brief, unreadable glance back at Lance. She wanted to apologize or maybe beg Yukiko to keep this mum, but she couldn't bring herself to draw yet more attention to Lance's presence. And, even as she knew that she had made a mistake, Mizu didn't have it in herself to regret it. At least, not yet.

To be completely honest, Yukiko appreciated Lance faffing about in her periphery trying to silently get dressed. She doubted the commander felt the same, but that was also fine. Yukiko kept her expression serious, fully present in the gravity of the situation, but grateful for just enough levity existing on the edges to help soothe her nerves while she awaited Miyamoto's response.

"I don't see any way to keep this a secret," the commander said softly as she finished tying her greaves. Standing up straight, she looked to Yukiko and said, "Stay alert but calm. Keep an ear to the ground about any similar disappearances. I'll walk the perimeter. Come find me immediately if you discover anything else amiss."

Yukiko gave a firm nod, the same nod she always gave when acknowledging orders. Miyamoto had left her plenty of agency within that, so her mind was starting to formulate her next moves, but she tried to quiet it while she was still here with the commander, waiting silently for a beat to see if Miyamoto would follow up with anything else. When she did not, Yukiko nodded again and then turned to take her leave, resisting the urge to throw Lieutenant Holloway another sheepish smile on her way out, though only barely.

Miyamoto stopped her, though.

"Yukiko," she said, and Yukiko swallowed heavily before turning her gaze back toward her commander--her friend. "From the sounds of it, there's nothing you could have done." Mizu let a long pause stand, her gaze meeting Yukiko's directly. "You've acted admirably."

Yukiko couldn't help the way her lips curled to the side into a crooked grin. She felt a bit caught out, she supposed--like Mizu must have picked up on, or at least anticipated, her current struggles with the guilt of the situation. In times past, Yukiko was quite good at accepting responsibility for only the oversights that were truly hers, but, well, those boundaries seemed to only be getting blurrier the more this war dragged on. Maybe, if she'd been with Ponderance herself tonight, she'd just be the other missing soldier--or maybe, she'd have been able to do something about the situation that older soldiers couldn't. Wouldn't be the first time. Still, she hadn't confided in Mizu about that, and now was certainly not the time to. And, there was still wisdom in Mizu's words regardless.

"Thank you," Yukiko said, her smile growing wider and warmer as she gave Mizu another nod, this one tilted just-so to acknowledge it came less from a captain than a friend. Then, it grew just a tiny bit mischievous, her gaze finally flicking over to Lance before returning to Mizu. "And right back at you."

She turned to leave at that, smiling to herself as she gave the tent's other occupants back their privacy.

((OOC Yukiko is probably stop-able, but it'd have to be emphatic lol. Lance I think is fully dressed by now and standing around awkwardly not sure what to do lol))

"Thank you," Yukiko said, her smile curling back into a familiar shape. She gave Mizu yet another nod, this one tilted as though to signal something that had little to do with their captain-commander relationship, though Mizu wasn't sure what to call it. Yukiko looked briefly to Lance then before returning her gaze to Mizu and said, "And right back at you."

Mizu's cheeks burned red immediately, but Yukiko was already turning to take her leave. The commander opened and gently closed her fists in confusion. What on earth had Yukiko meant? That Mizu had acted admirably? That what she had done with Lance was inevitable? She refused to believe either was true.

The dense ball of tension Mizu had wound into her chest started to unwind once Fujiwara was well and truly gone, and by the time the commander turned around to face Lance, he was fully dressed. She looked at him blankly, unsure what to do next. She needed him to take his leave, really. She needed to get out to patrol the camp.

Images of his lips and tongue between her legs flashed unhelpfully to mind. With some effort, she managed to redirect those thoughts to something a little less embarrassing. The sensation of stroking the backs of her fingers down Lance's upper arm. There, that was more manageable.

Her expression had softened in the process, but she still couldn't meet Lance's gaze directly.

"We couldn't... we couldn't have known... obviously," Mizu said, her eyes falling down toward her cot. She already missed the version of herself who had lain blissfully unaware of the rest of camp against Lance's chest. It was possible she might never see him again after this. And certainly not... like this.

Lance managed a crooked smile of his own as Fujiwara turned to leave, her final mischievous words ringing in the air.

"And right back at you."

That seemed to solidify that she wasn't upset at the commander's dalliance here, which was a relief. Still, Mizu--well, Miyamoto--still stood stiffly, her fists closing and opening tensely in the captain's wake. That melted Lance's smile, and he had little more than sheepishly raised eyebrows to show her when she finally turned her gaze to him, her expression utterly blank. Tightness coiled in his chest, but he tried not to show it. She did seem to soften after a moment, but her eyes lilted to the side as she did so, not quite able to meet his gaze. Lance's gaze trailed off as well, sheepishness growing even heavier in the silence.

"We couldn't..." Mizu finally started, and Lance couldn't help finally flinching a little. He could hear it in her voice: she regretted what they had done. Maybe not for its own sake, but as the commander. Maybe that had always been inevitable. "We couldn't have known... obviously."

"Obviously," Lance echoed in agreement, maybe a tinge of exasperation in his voice as he forced his gaze back to Mizu's face with some bravery. He didn't want to believe that her regret was inevitable. Surely even the commander deserved to let down her hair. But, what could he possibly say to that effect right now? Yukiko had literally just tried to say that, and Mizu was still closed up; would she really hear it any better from the very source of her shame right now?

Lance swallowed and swayed a little toward the tent's exit, the bravery in his gaze melting and his eyes shifting in the direction of his sway.

"Should I...?" one hand gestured that direction, and the other nervously rubbed at his neck as he stole one more glance at Mizu, apology in his eyes. He truly hadn't meant to cause her consternation tonight.

"Obviously," Lance echoed, and the hardness in his voice made her breath catch in her throat. Gods, she didn't want him to think... Gods. Everything had been so fluid, so easy with him before. And now? Was there any path to recovery? She didn't want him to leave like this.

Lance swayed with a step toward the exit. Her eyes caught the movement and reflexively caught his gaze. "Should I...?" he said and gestured toward the tent's opening as though asking permission to leave.

No... not permission. He was giving her one last opening. His eyes were soft and apologetic as though he were somehow at fault for all this. No, no, this was all wrong. She couldn't let this... She couldn't.

Stepping closer to Lance, she caught his cheek in the palm of one hand and looked at him, her brows pulled up and together, though her mouth still made an impassive line.

"I chose this," she said, thinking fondly of their spar, of sharing a meal together, of taking her armor off slowly while they talked together. "And when you go to the goddess," Mizu said, her voice catching slightly in her throat, "don't let her humble you with it." Mizu paused for a moment, bringing her other hand to caress his other cheek, one thumb moving subtly back and across. Finally, she pressed her forehead to his, her eyes closing to prevent any more emotion from leaving them.

All at once, Mizu stepped closer to him, and Lance couldn't help drawing in a soft gasp as she cupped his cheek in her hand.

"I chose this," she said, a warmth in her voice almost incongruous with the hard lines of her expression. Lance wanted to laugh, but it was too distant an impulse to manifest, instead floating in the air somewhere around him as he looked at Mizu with wide eyes.

"And when you go to the goddess," she continued, and Lance's heart thunked off-beat in his chest, the fear and discomfort of the moment flashing briefly across his expression. "Don't let her humble you with it."

Honestly, Lance was flabbergasted. He never expected any of this, and he had no idea what to do with it. Before he could collect himself to respond, Mizu touched his other cheek as well and brought their foreheads gently together, her thumb caressing his cheek almost as though beckoning the tears that wanted to fall. Gods, yes, he wanted to cry, but... But, didn't she need to get going?

Lance forced a soft chuckle, mostly to expel the tension he was feeling some way. He did raise his own hands to Mizu's cheeks also, reflecting her motion with care, hopeful that that would reassure her. He wanted to say something - right back at you came to mind, but gods, that was lame.

"I promise," he whispered after a moment. "And as for you," he went on, a smile curling on his lips as his hands brushed back into her hair. He used their new position to gently press their foreheads more firmly together - enough to clearly beckon her to stay, but if she pulled back in spite of that, he wouldn't fight her on it. "Don't apologize for letting your hair down. Even commanders get to."

Ugh, was that still lame? He genuinely couldn't tell. And gods, nervous butterflies swarmed inside of him, making him too antsy to stay still. He drew back then, caressing Mizu's shoulders on his way to standing up straight. It was admittedly a little bit tempting to retreat in to lieutenant mode - strike the right posture, summon the appropriate voice, use Miyamoto's proper title - but, no, as much as he felt responsible for helping them both to move along given the situation, he didn't want to just immediately shut her out; that didn't seem fair. With a light sigh, Lance tossed her a crooked, hopeful smile, and shrugged a little awkwardly.

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

Lance chuckled under his breath, and a sharp shot of pain slipped through Mizu's chest. Perhaps she was being ridiculous. They had only spent the better part of one evening together--other people had less casual affairs and felt nothing. Mizu knew her behavior stemmed from the fact that this was all still... rare for her. Both now and in her past. She prepared to steel herself again, to pull away from Lance and ensure that he saw nothing more of her emotionality, but he surprised her. He touched both of her cheeks in a reciprocal gesture--even now sensitive to her request that she be the one to initiate touch. Gods, ridiculous as it was, she was going to miss him when he left.

"I promise," he whispered, and Mizu let out a long, slow breath. "And as for you," he added, and Mizu stiffened a little, feeling suddenly more like a child than she had since she had actually been one. He stroked her hair, hastily tied back as it was, and pressed more urgently into her forehead. "Don't apologize for letting your hair down. Even commanders get to."

A ghost of a smile spread onto her lips at that. Maybe she was being too hard on herself. The pit of guilt that had collected in her stomach loosened, just a little. He pulled away from her, which reminded her of her promise to Yukiko and the duties that lay ahead of her. His hands fell from her cheeks to her shoulders as he stood up straight, but she wasn't going to begrudge him that. When the two of them stopped touching altogether, Mizu felt a little uneasy on her own legs.

Lance sighed lightly with what Mizu hoped was satisfaction and smiled crookedly in her direction.

With a shrug, he asked, "Is there anything I can do to help?" Mizu stood up straight as her eyes searched the floor for what was next. She obviously needed to get a lay of the land, but she also felt a tug to rouse Captain Kade from his sleep. He would know best how to proceed given the new information or at least would give her counsel. They needed to have a plan of what to say to the rest of camp come dawn. She thought, after a lap around camp, she would be able to spare a few moments to wake the captain, but if Lance needed something to do...

Granted, sending Holloway to Kade all but proved that Holloway and she had been involved. But then again, she knew Kade had her tent watched, and Lance had certainly overstayed his welcome. If she sent Lance, Kade would know that Mizu wasn't trying to hide what she had done. Or, at least, not from him. Given that they had Yukiko as witness now, perhaps that was actually a wise play.

Realizing she had left Lance to his own devices for half a minute, she looked at him with a softness and said, "You're welcome to go get some rest, Lieutenant Holloway. But, if you really want to help, go and bring Captain Kade up to speed while I do my patrol. I'd like him to meet me in front of my tent to discuss options as soon as possible."

It was a request rather than a command--rather out of character for her. But if Lance was going to catch on to the reason for sending Lance in her stead, she wanted him to be able to opt out if he wanted.

Mizu was quiet for a moment, and Lance's stomach fluttered anxiously, but he tried to reassure himself that she was surely puzzling out strategy, that it was normal for that to take some time.

She did finally look back to him with a surprising softness in her expression, and Lance couldn't help the wide, stupid grin that lit up his expression in response.

"You're welcome to go get some rest, Lieutenant Holloway," she said, and a mixture of relief and melancholy flooded through him. Gods, he was tired - his limbs scarcely felt real, and he marveled a little that he was somehow standing. "But," Mizu--Miyamoto, it seemed it was time to start calling her--continued, drawing him back to alertness, "if you really want to help, go and bring Captain Kade up to speed while I do my patrol. I'd like him to meet me in front of my tent to discuss options as soon as possible."

Initially, Lance nodded with an innocent sort of cheeriness, happy to be given a task that seemed both helpful and perfectly easy to complete. Then, understanding dawned in a gentle bloom, widening his eyes and adding another crooked sharpness to his grin. Kade would know. Miyamoto knew that Kade would know.

Lance reeled his expression in, though, not wanting to look crude or make Mizu--yes, Mizu--nervous. As much as he loved a good brag, he could let this one play out in his wake how it would. It was more than enough that she wasn't scrambling to hide it.

Once his expression was softer, Lance gently touched a hand to his stomach and made a small bow, thoroughly stepping into lieutenant mode with the gesture.

"Aye, Commander," he said simply. When he returned to standing his grin was one that Miyamoto had seen him wear a million times, sure to approach his next task with simple enthusiasm. He made a final nonverbal check if there was anything else, tilting his head toward the tent's exit before committing to taking his leave.

When Lance nodded happily, Mizu wondered if the implications of sending him to Kade were lost on Lance. But, when Lance's eyes widened and his grin deepened, the commander knew Lance understood the gravity of the gesture. They had discussed the possibility of Mizu denying everything that had happened, but they hadn't exactly discussed what would happen if she wanted to tell others. But, it seemed as though Lance was content to follow her lead on the matter, as he had when they touched.

"Aye, Commander," he said.

Mizu watched his face soften as Lance took a bow, and she wished, not the for the first time, that they had had more time together. But, she had always been good at making due.

By the time he stood up, his expression was fully back to one she recognized--not because of what had transpired between them tonight but because that had been his default expression the other times she had seen him in camp.

Once he took his leave, the Commander gathered her hair into her more characteristic tight bun, fastened her armor more tightly, and stepped out herself to begin her patrol, eyes sharp, heart tender.