Written Wonderland

Ren nodded but still looked hesitant. For a moment, Jaz thought she might have to push Ren out the door--playfully, of course--but surely that would be crossing some boundary.

But then he did turn to go, and Jaz's heart felt as though it left went him. Only emptiness with flickers and sparks of excitement filled the space. Jaz rubbed her wrist, mentally urging her body to absorb whatever nourishment it could to make her hand go back to a normal color.

Wait... normal? Gods, was she already wishing her blue skin away?

But, well, it was an inconvenience here, at least while people didn't know what she was. And she would need to get used to it.

With a huff of a sigh, Jaz sat down on the floor of the apothecary, looking around the place and all the ingredients in their various states of preparation. She thought about getting brave and testing some of them herself, but when she looked down at her hand, she realized the blue had fully faded.

With an excited flash of teeth, Jaz stood up, composed herself, and walked back into the main room.

The brightness of the room--the fires and torches, the colors of the food, the tambor of excited voices--filled Jaz's chest immediately, and she very nearly hopped with excitement. She looked over to the person playing a stringed instrument, clearly immersed in their own flow, and felt giddy. Jaz twirled on her way that direction, forgetting for a moment that she was looking for Monica. Drawn to the person with the instrument, she approached, looking with awe and hunger at their nimble fingers moving over and over their strings, the sounds echoing through the whole of the large space. Jaz laughed as she moved her body, imagining how it might feel to become smoke in this place and experience all the vibrations of the music fully move through her.

A nervous panic shot up her stomach at the thought, though, snapping her out of her dance. She couldn't afford an accident here. She looked over where a number of people were sitting, biting her lip nervously. She saw Ren sitting with a blond man but looked quickly away before she caught Ren's eye, looking for Monica in earnest now. She wanted Ren to trust her to handle herself.

Jaz turned around, wondering where Monica could be and almost ran right into her.

"Oh!" Jaz said, blushing deeply. "I was just coming to look for you." Jaz looked down at her feet for a moment, gathering her resolve and the words, before she looked back up at Monica. "Could you spare a few minutes with me?"

Monica had done her best not to worry while Ren and Jaz were gone for the day. She'd spoken with Sage and learned that her mentor had some knowledge of djinn, which was heartening, though she didn't know anything about how to get one home. Sage had also indicated caution around specifically giving djinn commands, which was not exactly heartening, knowing Ren. But, all she could do was hope that they would both get through the day all right with each other.

Thankfully, the pair returned right as Monica was finishing setting out things for dinner that evening.

"Successful day?" she asked hopefully after approaching them, eyeing the items Ren and Jaz both carried.

"Yes, very," Ren nodded. "Hoping we could indulge in some dinner before heading on our way."

"Of course," Monica smiled, relieved and honestly beyond happy that they'd get to rest and replenish a bit here before their journey home. "Feel free to stow your items in the apothecary, if you would like. Make yourselves comfortable, and let me know if you need anything."

"Thank you," Ren nodded again to her, offering a soft, grateful smile, and then led Jaz that direction. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but it seemed like they were more comfortable with each other now. Here was hoping.

Monica checked in on one of the more recent arrivals to the temple gathering, welcoming them into the space. She kept her eye on the curtain to the apothecary, but trusted that Ren and Jaz would do whatever they needed to do. After a few moments, Ren emerged without Jaz, but he offered Monica a reassuring nod, and so she finished up her conversation with the other attendee before heading over to Ren to check in. He was of course terse as ever, but seemed relaxed enough, and stated simply that Jaz was recovering from some touch and would be out soon. Monica did her best not to flash Ren any kind of smile that would make him uncomfortable, but it was heartwarming to hear that he was sharing touch with Jaz. That seemed quite promising after their interactions that morning.

He got food and settled down, relaxing into the space, and Monica's heart swelled with happiness; with love for this place and these people. Evenings like these filled her with such gratitude - and it was only just beginning!

She was mid a lovely little catch-up conversation with someone when she spotted Jaz come out of the apothecary. Monica was about to let her interlocutor know that she needed to go see to someone else, when she realized that Jaz was headed toward the musician playing by Sankera's altar. Not just heading that direction, but twirling, awe and glee present in her burgeoning dance, laughter happily inviting attention as a few other folks looked over. Then Jaz stopped suddenly, and at that, Monica politely stepped away from her present conversation to go tend to the town's newest arrival.

"Oh!" Jaz said when she turned around, very nearly bumping into Monica as she approached. "I was just coming to look for you." Jaz looked down at her feet for a moment before returning her gaze to Monica's with some resolve. "Could you spare a few minutes with me?"

Monica smiled warmly, and nodded.

"I would be delighted to."

She considered gesturing for Jaz to lead the way, but remembered her discomfort with the furs to the inner chamber, and instead opted to take the lead. She was quiet as they walked through the temple and into the apothecary.

"I'm glad it seems you got everything you needed," she said warmly as she lit the lantern, nodding briefly towards the things that Jaz and Ren had set down there. She didn't wait for Jaz to reply before she drew open the furs to the inner chamber, and held them open for Jaz to step on inside.

Monica smiled, and it was like the sun. Not the lavender sun Jaz remembered from the goddess' realm--more like the sun here--but it was warm and welcoming all the same.

Jaz grinned with eyebrows raised, her excitement near to brimming. She followed Monica back to the apothecary.

"I'm glad it seems you got everything you needed," Monica said, lighting a nearby lantern. Jaz nodded but wasn't sure that Monica had seen her as she had already moved to pull the furs aside for Jaz.

Happily, Jaz moved into the small inner chamber from before, taking a deep breath and remembering everything that had happened earlier here. Somehow, being back in the physical location, it was easier to remember not only the awkward way the three of them had parted but also the bliss each of them had undeniably felt before Ren had left. Jaz shivered pleasantly, her desire to hold both of Monica's hands strong.

"Ren was a huge help," Jaz said, hoping to move on quickly from the subject. "I figured he could use a break from all... this." Jaz smiled and tilted her head at Monica, full of hope that Monica actually wanted all the strangeness that Jaz was.

"I'd..." Jaz started, not very accustomed to asking so directly for what she wanted. "I'd really like to touch you. And I'd like to show you more of where I'm from, if you'd let me." Jaz paused, a little unsure of herself. "I feel very comfortable with any touch you might offer me, but I am nervous about what is... about what you..." Jaz shook her head, trying to regather confidence. "Tell me if I do something you don't like?" She finally said with slightly squinted eyes. She relaxed a moment later, however, holding out both her hands.

Monica gently set the lantern down on the small table in the center as Jaz took a breath in the space. She always liked coming back here, arriving more deeply with whomever accompanied her. She felt just a little bit nervous, not knowing exactly where Jaz was at, but she was hopeful, and honestly excited to touch Jaz again. It was an almost giddy feeling in her chest that she was rather unaccustomed to, but it seemed harmless enough - like a little sparkle, simply offering more illumination in fun little ways.

"Ren was a huge help," Jaz said after a moment. "I figured he could use a break from all... this." She smiled and tilted her head at Monica, and Monica smiled and offered a sympathetic tilt in return. Yes, Ren frequently could use breaks, from anything, as far as Monica understood him.

"I'd..." Jaz stammered a moment, and the nervous, giddy sparkle in Monica's chest shimmered brighter. "I'd really like to touch you. And I'd like to show you more of where I'm from, if you'd let me." Jaz paused there, but seemed like she had more to say. Monica smiled wide, nodding gently, hoping to offer reassurance while Jaz found her next words. "I feel very comfortable with any touch you might offer me," Jaz continued, "but I am nervous about what is... about what you..." Jaz shook her head, before finally settling on, "Tell me if I do something you don't like?" Her eyes squinted a little as she said it, but then she relaxed, and held her hands out to Monica.

Monica nodded, understanding settling into her. She wanted to reassure Jaz that she as not at risk in the same ways that Ren was, but she took a moment to chew on the words to articulate her reply.

"I would love to touch your hands and arms as we did earlier," she said gently, reaching out her own hands toward Jaz, watching as the distance between their fingers shrank but did not disappear fully quite yet. "And I feel comfortable offering you guidance as we explore."

She nearly added something about Ren's struggles with that, or perhaps a caveat that she probably was not interested in either of them climbing into the other's lap, but she let those thoughts drift away unspoken--unhelpful, she deemed, more complicating than clarifying. She wanted to focus more on where they were, than where they were not. So, at last, she lifted her eyes to meet Jaz's gaze, and gently laced her fingers together with Jaz's, excited sparkles surely the first sentiment to shine through the connection as it formed.

Monica nodded, and little fiery sparks tried to ignite in Jaz's stomach.

She started reaching toward Jaz, and Jaz felt the impending touch call all her cravings for it to the surface, and along with it a great hungry maw of loneliness and confusion. Monica held her hands just slightly away from her, however, and Jaz thought she saw the air itself pulse with anticipation.

"I would love to touch your hands and arms as we did earlier," Monica said. Her speech was careful and cautious, but there was a glint in her eye that excited Jaz. Monica did want this. But... only hands? Arms? "And I feel comfortable offering you guidance as we explore." Okay, so more is on the table, Jaz thought.

After another moment, Monica met Jaz's gaze and finally laced her fingers together with Jaz's.

Jaz's vision faded toward darkness almost immediately as gentle, tingling sparks went through both Monica and Jaz in all directions. Jaz's craving threatened to overwhelm her for a moment--there was so much to keep at bay--but the darkness behind her eyes dissipated as she gathered control over herself and blinked to focus on the room again. Jaz smiled shyly, sure that Monica had seen some of that. Still, she squeezed Monica's hands in reassurance. They could do this.

Tentatively, Jaz unlaced her fingers from Monica's but tried very hard not to break skin contact. Instead, she slid her hands up around Monica's wrists and over her forearms, stepping a little closer to the woman in the process. She ran her fingers up over the woman's elbows and finally rested on her shoulders, taking another tentative step forward. And then, trying to meet Monica's eyes to check in but also paying a lot of attention to any physical or emotional indications of displeasure, Jaz gathered the woman into a hug.

((OOC: The hug would relax Jaz a lot if it goes well, and Jaz could imagine staying like that for some time.))

Monica shivered gleefully as tiny sparks of excitement danced through her, but they felt... reflective? They were hers, and Jaz was... dark? Her eyes were distant, and Monica worried that Jaz might be pulling back--ironically, not unlike Ren was prone to. But in just a blink Jaz smiled shyly, squeezing Monica's hands with reassurance, presensing them both together. Monica smiled, exhaling with relief and gently squeezing Jaz's hands in kind.

Then, Jaz suprised her by unlacing their fingers--sparking yet another little cascade of worry, but she never quite broke contact. Instead her fingers trailed lightly up Monica's wrists and forearms, elbows and shoulders, sending nervous, tingly flares swirling over Monica's skin and through her stomach as Jaz stepped closer to her. Monica breathed deeply, anchoring herself in this room she loved so dearly, in her commitment to holding her heart open and tending to this community as best she could--including its newest additions. Whatever nervousness she felt, it was worth it to give this interaction the best possible chance to nourish them both.

Jaz looked in Monica's eyes, curious and questioning, her own nervousness plain. Slowly, bravely, Jaz was gathering Monica into a hug, and Monica's nervousness broke in a great wave within her, tears streaming down her cheeks as she wrapped her arms around Jaz, welcoming her with a full heart. Welcome, welcome, welcome, was nearly all that Monica could think, happiness pouring from her center.

Through their touch connection, Jaz felt Monica's nervousness, but it was mixed with such a profound encouragement and openness such that Jaz felt comfortable continuing and finally brought Monica toward her a little in an embrace. Her arms moved over Monica's shoulders, and she let her hands dangle a little over the edge. Monica returned the embrace, gathering Jaz into her own arms. Jaz quickly realized that the other woman was crying. Her tears were deep and steady, but over and over Jaz felt wave after wave of reassurance through Monica's body. The priestess wanted so much for Jaz to feel welcome and to be welcoming. And she was doing so well. Happiness poured out of Monica in little bubbling bursts, and it wasn't long before Jaz was crying, too, out of gratitude and just the profundity of sharing all this.

Jaz casually massaged the back of Monica's neck, holding her close and nuzzling her cheek against Monica's ear. Quietly, she told the woman, "You've done so well for this place. I can see it alive with peace and happiness and pleasure and grace and... Monica, it is truly beautiful. To think that I could have gone anywhere and the gates brought me here. You're doing so well. You're doing so well."

Maybe Jaz didn't need to say it. Maybe her body and their shared touch was saying it, but Jaz didn't want even the slightest chance of Monica not believing her. This woman truly deserved some praise, and Jaz felt honored to be someone in a position to offer it to her.

It wasn't long before tears were pouring from Jaz, too, gratitude and ineffable profundity flowing through them as Jaz gently massaged the back of Monica's neck, and Monica caressed her palms warmly up and down Jaz's back.

"You've done so well for this place," Jaz said quietly in Monica's ear, nearly startling her. "I can see it alive with peace and happiness and pleasure and grace and... Monica, it is truly beautiful. To think that I could have gone anywhere and the gates brought me here. You're doing so well. You're doing so well."

Monica nuzzled her face down against Jaz's neck, squeezing her arms around her tight. She wasn't entirely sure what she felt, but if she had to put a word to it, perhaps awe? All she knew for certain was that she was deeply, profoundly grateful for this moment with Jaz, and she allowed herself a revelry of sorts, letting that awe and gratitude and whatever else swirl around within her, stoking her tears to flow freely.

Finally, she regathered herself with a deep breath, and rested her chin on Jaz's shoulder.

"Thank you," she said, her voice soft like velvet. "I'm so glad that your journey brought you here."

"Thank you. I'm so glad your journey brought you here."

Monica nuzzled against Jaz's face, happiness pouring out of her. Gods, it was so much easier to have a social interaction when Jaz was in contact with someone. There was no mistaking how they felt, or at least many fewer mistakes.

Monica squeezed Jaz more tightly, and Jaz hummed, a craving for deeper connection taking root in and around her core.

As Monica took a deep breath and rested her chin on Jaz's shoulder, Jaz massaged down Monica's back gently on either side of her spine, slowly beginning to learn the woman's body. Jaz then pressed her cheek more deliberately against Monica's with a subtle undulating pressure. Jaz's breathing started to pick up slightly, and she took a step closer to Monica, closing some of the distance.

Jaz hummed softly, and Monica felt the vibration of it buzz pleasantly through her, reverberating subtly in her chest. She swayed a little without quite realizing, attention following the gentle massage of Jaz's hands down either side of her spine. Her own fingers got braver about massaging into the muscles of Jaz's back, recalling the joy she had felt in touching their arms before, and happily inviting it into this touch now. But as she sank in, she also found a note of caution within herself, or maybe just a tug toward something slightly different.

Jaz pressed her cheek against Monica's, her breath and body subtly beginning to undulate, and Monica offered it curiosity in her attention, her fingers quietly asking not just about Jaz's body but also about her home. She had mentioned that she wanted to share about it. Monica recalled some of what Jaz had shared with her earlier--the waterfall where Jaz had collected some of her precious stones, with someone whom Monica had reminded Jaz of. She wanted to know more, to learn more about Jaz and her home and her family, and she trusted that the curiosity would communicate through their embrace.