Written Wonderland

Rav was grateful that Nick took his time in responding. It made it easier to trust whatever he was about to say.

"Yeah," Nick said, his nervous smile returning. "As long as we..." he trailed off, shaking his head briefly. "I guess, admittedly I can think of ways my place might not be ideal for contact improv, come to think of it, but I'd love to have you over."

Rav thought that over for a moment, but before he could fully formulate a thought, he decided to press Nick, "As long as we... what?" Eyebrow quirked, one corner of his mouth lifted. He didn't want Nick to leave anything unsaid, and Rav would rather have a clear picture of what they were getting themselves into.

"As long as we... what?" Rav pressed after a moment, eyebrow quirked and one corner of his mouth lifted. Nick swallowed, embarassment quirking his own smile.

"Don't go in attached to contact improv being the thing, I guess. It might work, I'm just not sure - there are open spaces, but the floor options are wood or concrete, and the wood floor is right outside my roommates' rooms." Nick shrugged a little, lifting his eyebrows in a timid hopefulness.

He could feel more chattering trying to bubble up--preemptive reassurances about his roommates being chill, or what other activities they could do if contact improv didn't work out. But, he was working on not trying to preempt things, and so instead, he raised his mocha to his lips to help him stay quiet. It was the perfect warmth, and he took a long, indulgent sip, letting his eyes slide shut to fully enjoy the experience.

Nick swallowed, but his embarrassed smile returned.

"Don't go in attached to contact improv being the thing, I guess. It might work, I'm just not sure--there are open spaces, but the floor options are wood or concrete, and the wood floor is right outside my roommates' rooms." Nick shrugged, lifting his eyebrows. After a moment of looking like he might say more, he instead took a long sip of his mocha, closing his eyes to enjoy it.

Rav's lips curled into a full smirk, an excitement bubbling up in his chest.

"I have a couple pairs of knee pads I could bring, just in case." They spent some time calendaring together, finding a date in the next week that worked for both of them.

That done, Rav mentally checked to see if he had covered all the ground he hoped to cover in this conversation, lips momentarily pursed.

"Hey..." Rav started, tempted to reach toward Nick but refraining. "Do you... uh... do you have a therapist? Or someone you could talk to about all this? I don't want you to feel like you have to keep it a secret. And it would make me feel better if I knew you had someone who would tell you if you were acting..." Rav struggled to find a reasonable word. Stupid? Reckless? Irresponsible? "...if you were acting outside your own integrity."

((OOC: I wanted to hand-wave the calendaring but lmk if that seems out of place.))

"I have a couple pairs of knee pads I could bring, just in case." Rav had on a wide smirk, and Nick very nearly giggled, though he wasn't entirely sure why. Happy nervousness, sure, but there was also something... absurd, and yet straightforward, about knee pads. Honestly, he appreciated Rav's practicality there, and he nodded.

It was a little surreal when they got to taking out their phones and calendaring, but excitement bubbled up in Nick as they settled on a date. Now, he could look forward to and prepare for something other than just seeing Rav at class. Warmth swirled in his stomach at the thought.

Rav started to get heavy once that was done, though, and Nick swallowed, the weight of whatever pursed Rav's lips settling into his stomach. Nick took a drink of his mocha, maybe to offer some additional warmth to the heaviness, but he kept his eyes curiously on Rav this time as he enjoyed his drink.

"Hey... Do you... uh... do you have a therapist? Or someone you could talk to about all this?" Nick blinked in surprise, but nodded faintly. Not enough for Rav to catch, maybe, as he kept going, "I don't want you to feel like you have to keep it a secret. And it would make me feel better if I knew you had someone who would tell you if you were acting... if you were acting outside your own integrity."

Nick nodded a little more overtly as he set down his mug and swallowed his previous sip.

"Yeah, I'm seeing a therapist. Working on checking in." Nick smiled with a glint of playfulness in his eyes, hopeful that connecting back to something they'd already touched in conversation might offer Rav some extra reassurance. It also offered a tiny, surprising little thrill for Nick, though the butterflies didn't stir within him until after his words had hung in the air for a blink or two, when the sudden sensation added a fresh bit of crookedness to his smile.

Nick nodded, and Rav let out a pent-up breath. He was really proud to have identified all that. He didn't want to put Nick in a position where Nick felt like he had to hide any of this, and knowing that wasn't the case? giving Nick permission to talk? It felt good.

"Yeah, I'm seeing a therapist. Working on checking in." Rav nodded as Nick smiled, a glint in his eye, though Rav could not exactly place why for. He wanted to ask Nick what kind of situation had led to seeking out a therapist, but he thought that was maybe too invasive for this conversation. He didn't need Nick to spill his trauma just before Rav needed to leave for work.

"It's a date, then," Rav said, his confidence returning as he drank the last of his americano. "May we both learn a new way to dance."

((OOC: Happy to end the scene here and maybe Nick can set up what his place looks like? I'm thinking maybe a week has passed? Also, I think Rav and Hannah should have a text message convo between then and now.))

"It's a date, then," Rav said. "May we both learn a new way to dance."

Nick smiled, but his gaze meandered down and to the side. He felt impulses to rub at his hair or take a sip of his drink--a gesture to hide his probably-obvious fluster, maybe--but he held them at bay, instead just riding out the sensation of butterflies as they fluttered from his chest out into his limbs and finally tingling his scalp and toes. Once the sensation dissipated, he returned his gaze to Rav with a nod, his cheeks warmly colored and his expression bright and confident. He playfully raised his mug as if to offer a toast, and then closed his eyes as he returned his mug to his lips, and he happily relished the last of his hot cocoa's sweet, rich warmth.

"Well, it's time for me to go to work." Rav made the announcement abruptly--not unlike his usual goodbye, really, and, well, they were both done with their drinks. Even so, a small sadness weighed in Nick's chest, though he tried to keep it out of his expression. He nodded and began to stand from his seat, contemplating briefly what to say in farewell. His eyes clocked Rav standing as well, and a sense of urgency bubbled up out of him.

"Um, would you--" but he stopped himself, and set his own hands against his chest as his eyes looked away, smile a little embarassed. This was an impulse he was working on, too--an impulse to offer to someone else what he wanted himself. He sighed lightly, and returned his gaze to Rav with a sheepish smile.

"I would... love to hug you, if..." Nick lowered his hands to his sides and spread them just subtly--welcoming of a hug, but not going in for one. His eyes looked hopeful, if a dash terrified. He didn't know what he'd thought he might say after 'if', and he let it hang in the air, sure he'd just dig himself into a hole if he tried to finish the thought.

Rav was grateful his witty line had come off well--Nick was practically blushing from head to toe, at least as far as Rav could see. Nick then nodded, raising his mug to finish off his drink, too. Time for Rav to make his exit, then.

"Well, it's time for work," he said, standing. Nick looked up at him with a momentary waver in his lips, but Rav was used to letting people down this way--dodging, really.

Nick stood as well, saying "Um, would you--" but then he stopped himself, placing a hand on his own chest. He couldn't meet Rav's gaze for a moment. "I would... love to hug you, if..." Nick said, opening his hands at his sides as though to welcome exactly that. Rav's eyes flicked immediately to the rest of the room, the other patrons, the baristas, clocking the whole scene in half a breath. Hugs were harmless enough, weren't they? Rav had hugged Hannah, but not in public. And if a momentary brush with Nick on the dance floor was enough to trigger Rav...

Rav felt his heartbeat and breath quicken of its own accord, though he at least kept his breath soundless. It was a decent way to calm down... or at least, to appear calm. Rav set his jaw, looking down at Nick, his brows furrowed in what he was afraid probably looked like anger. And perhaps he was angry, at Nick, at himself, for being put in this position.

But he would have to get over all of this somehow. Normal people hugged. He knew he was taking too long to respond.

Rav sighed heavily, resisting the urge to run a hand through his hair. Every position he imagined with Nick--standing a little further away than was necessary, coming in from the side--felt absurd, too obviously another dodge. He imagined turning around and letting Nick jump on his back to embrace him--that seemed harmless enough--but he didn't expect the coffee shop patrons would appreciate that. Too much horsing around.

"Walk with me," Rav said, moving past Nick toward the door.

No sooner had Nick made his request than Rav's eyes darted around the room. Nick couldn't help looking around, also. Was Rav worried about something? No more attention seemed to be on them than when Nick had checked before. Maybe a barista had clocked that they were about to leave, but that didn't seem like it would matter...?

When Nick looked back to Rav, Rav looked angry, and Nick's stomach twisted with guilt and discomfort. He had put Rav on the spot, and just after they'd discussed some really heavy things. All at once, he felt he should have known that Rav wouldn't be up for physical contact after that--after all, he'd needed to retreat so wholly from contact just the other day, when all this had first come up. Nick felt selfish, and tears felt embarassingly nearby, tightening his throat as his mind scrambled for how to release Rav from the pressure of his ask. Before he could find the words, Rav sighed.

"Walk with me," Rav said, moving past Nick toward the door.

Nick was stunned for half a moment, and had to rush a few steps to catch up. "Sure," he said, a bit breathless from the jolt of surprise that had disrupted the still-lingering twists in his stomach. His eyes watched Rav with attentive nervousness, anxious to understand what Rav had in mind for this walk.