Written Wonderland

Yukiko shook her head in response, and Mizu softened, realizing that she had failed Yukiko in some way. Here Mizu was, asking if Horu was disappointed in her, and her first instinct was to defend herself? Gods, she was never going to get used to this.

"I only ask because, if the goddess of revelation were to have any qualms with you, secrets kept would be my only guess." She raised her hands on either side, palms out before she continued, "But I don't presume to know. I can't see enough of the picture--mine, or yours. I don't judge you for it at all, Mizu, and it's not as though the ember goddess condemns discretion."

Mizu lowered her head, humbled somewhat. Of course she would need to defend her secrets. Hadn't that ultimately been what had tied her into these knots?

"That was... hasty of me. Forgive me," Mizu said, looking at Yukiko with genuine apology in her eyes. "You have every right to ask questions. And you have done me a service in listening to all my... indiscretions." She shook her head, remembering what Yukiko had said just a moment ago. "No, my need for human connection. I am deeply grateful."

Mizu paused again, wondering if they could salvage the conversation.

"You've been a friend to me long since this war began, and I hope to continue to know you in that capacity. And, should your goals to find your own role in the heavens align with our cause, I really would be happy to help you."

Mizu looked a little forlorn and wished Yukiko might make some physical gesture again so she could accept it this time. She didn't feel bold enough to offer one herself.

"Do please ask before performing more... magic on me, though," Mizu added finally getting a handle on what about their interaction had unnerved her so deeply. "I imagine you have limited understanding or control of it, but I don't want to be someone you experiment on. Not, at least, without some notice."

They were navigating a friendship, a commander-captain relationship, and a god-supplicant relationship all at the same time, and Mizu could not help the conversation from traversing all three. She hoped Yukiko would understand.

"That was... hasty of me. Forgive me," Mizu said, looking at Yukiko with genuine apology in her eyes. "You have every right to ask questions. And you have done me a service in listening to all my... indiscretions." She shook her head, correcting herself. "No, my need for human connection. I am deeply grateful."

Yukiko pressed her hands over her heart again, offering Mizu a warm smile, grateful that their trust hadn't severed.

"You've been a friend to me long since this war began," Mizu continued, "and I hope to continue to know you in that capacity. And, should your goals to find your own role in the heavens align with our cause, I really would be happy to help you."

Yukiko felt tender flames of love and joy dance happily in her chest, but Mizu looked... forlorn. Yukiko once again felt a pull to reach for her, but she hesitated, and Mizu spoke again.

"Do please ask before performing more... magic on me, though," she said. "I imagine you have limited understanding or control of it, but I don't want to be someone you experiment on. Not, at least, without some notice."

At that, Yukiko smiled a bit sheepishly, eyebrows dipped in apology.

"Of course," she said. "I... did it somewhat thoughtlessly, forgive me. Today has been a day of flaring instinct, it seems, but of course that's no excuse. I will slow myself down long enough to ask."

Then, tentatively, she lowered her hands from her chest, gently offering them palms-up toward Mizu, if she wanted to take them.

"You have been a friend to me, too, and I am beyond grateful that it seems plausible to weather these absolutely bizarre circumstances together."

"Of course," Yukiko said in response. "I... did it somewhat thoughtlessly, forgive me. Today has been a day of flaring instinct, it seems, but of course that's no excuse. I will slow myself down long enough to ask."

Mizu nodded. That was more than enough. Yukiko let her hands fall from her chest and offered them palms-up to Mizu. This time, with only a little hesitation, she did. It was still a slightly awkward gesture, but Mizu did take some comfort in it.

"You have been a friend to me, too, and I am beyond grateful that it seems plausible to weather these absolutely bizarre circumstances together," Yukiko said.

Mizu laughed a little and nodded. Yes, it had all been bizarre.

"And then there's the ceremony tonight," Mizu said, a little solemnly. "To add to everything else." With the slightest quirk of the corner of her mouth, Mizu added, "May the gods look favorably on us all."

((OOC: Happy to end the interaction here or have you reply. Either way.))

Mizu accepted Yukiko's hands, and Yukiko's smile brightened, happiness flaring more brightly in her chest. Mizu even laughed a little, nodding along that their circumstances were indeed bizarre. How precious it was, to hear Mizu laugh. Yukiko felt in that moment that she had done something very right, amidst whatever other mistakes.

"And then there's the ceremony tonight, to add to everything else," Mizu said, a little solemnly, and Yukiko sobered as well. Though, with the slightest quirk of the corner of her mouth, Mizu added, "May the gods look favorably on us all." To that, Yukiko allowed herself a soft giggle, and she gave Mizu's hands a jovial squeeze, though a weariness settled over her as she looked to what was next.

Her gaze fell to their hands together, her brow drawing together a little in thought. She knew who her next visit would be to, but she didn't feel ready to go to it. Finally, after a little bit of mental searching, she found what else Mizu might be able to help her with. Even after she found it, though, it was difficult to find the words. She wanted Mizu's advice about Evan--about when she should tell him--but Mizu wouldn't be able to properly advise her until Yukiko told her everything. And, she wanted to, especially after all that Mizu had just shared with her, but... she couldn't betray Evan's trust any more than she already had. Not unless Mizu needed her to, but right now, it all just felt selfish.

With a heavy sigh, Yukiko drew her gaze back up to Mizu with another crooked, sheepish smile, nervousness plain in her still-wet eyes.

"I don't wish to encroach on the misty goddess' night," she said, and then paused, still searching for the words she needed to say. "I need to tell Lieutenant Reilley about what I am, and perhaps a few of my cadets, but I will request they not share about it until tomorrow, which I believe they will abide." Then she swallowed, a subtle note of pleading entering her gaze before she continued.

"I would greatly appreciate if you would be willing to... that is, when Rutliff returns from the goddess in the morning, I would be very grateful if you would tell him that I need to speak with him as soon as he is able. He shouldn't have to learn about this from anyone else but me."

Perhaps that in itself was a tip of her hand, but surely she'd allowed Mizu comparable glances already, and this one, at least, did feel necessary. However much Evan might hate it for Yukiko to be the one to reveal their history to Mizu, she suspected he would hate it even more to learn of Yukiko's recent revalations second-hand.

It was good to share a moment of mirth with Yukiko, however brief.

Soon, though, Yukiko was staring down at their clasped hands with heaviness, and with a big sigh, she finally spoke.

"I don't wish to encroach on the misty goddess' night," she said, pausing for a moment. "I need to tell Lieutenant Reilley about what I am, and perhaps a few of my cadets, but I will request they not share about it until tomorrow, which I believe they will abide." Mizu nodded. She felt that she needed to follow Yukiko's lead, at least on this matter.

Yukiko continued, "I would greatly appreciate if you would be willing to... that is, when Rutliff returns from the goddess in the morning, I would be very grateful if you would tell him that I need to speak with him as soon as he is able. He shouldn't have to learn about this from anyone else but me."

Mizu's eyes narrowed slightly, curious rather than suspicious. But, upon consideration, it made sense that Evan was a logical person to tell next, after her lieutenant and the cadets who had already seen something during the last battle. Evan was serving another goddess, and surely there would be complications around Dehaljadrun's relationship with Horu. Mizu thought there were stories about the two gods--people told uncountable myths--but she didn't remember any of them. At the time they had felt like a way to pass the time rather than an attempt at truth.

Again, Mizu nodded. "I appreciate you considering the breadth of the situation, Captain Fujiwara." And Mizu smiled, just a little, hopeful that her captain would appreciate it.

Mizu nodded, and smiled, just a little. "I appreciate you considering the breadth of the situation, Captain Fujiwara."

Yukiko smiled brightly in return, relieved and grateful that Mizu seemed amenable to her plans from here.

"Thank you," she said with a sigh, squeezing Mizu's hands once more before releasing them, and wiping again at her teary face. "I suppose I should go talk to my lieutenant, then." Maybe after a stop by the river to freshen up a bit, but that was just details. Her smile did a lot, warm with reassurance that she felt confident in her path, even if her eyes were red and puffy. She lingered for a moment, though, open to any last thoughts or exchanges that Mizu might like to end on.