Written Wonderland

Novelty hoped Philip wouldn't shut down or dismiss the question, and those fears flared further when Philip looked back toward the purple glow on the ground behind them. But, Novelty was thoroughly surprised and pleased when Philip beckoned Novelty to follow, the lieutenant's hand slipping closer toward Novelty's own. With a quiet surety and firmness, Novelty accepted the gesture and nodded with a wide smile. He would, indeed, follow this man wherever he wanted to go tonight. If Novelty was complicit in some abstract possibility of infidelity, he was also complicit in being one half of what could be the experience of a lifetime, and he wasn't going to pass that up.

Philip gently lead them away from the purple glow, not quite back towards camp, but not further into the forest either; he was tracking more or less alongside camp, at least as best he could gauge, simply putting distance between them and the pull of the clearing behind them.

Truthfully, he wasn't entirely sure what he was looking for, other than getting out from under the shadow of the glow. Once he no longer felt that pull, he started eyeing the landscape a bit more intently, calculating indeed what his desires even were. In some ways he lamented that even some distance from that purple glow, the forest still reminded him of the goddess' realm, especially through the lens he currently looked through. His hand instinctively tightened its grip on Novelty's as the memory of shoving Evan on the ground flash through him, and he couldn't quite help coming to a stop, needing to take a breath to steady himself. He knew he didn't want to do that to Novelty.

So, he turned to face the soldier, and gently reached for Novelty's other hand, his eyes solemnly watching their fingers touch and entwine.

"I.. don't want to do anything you don't want." he said softly, stepping closer to Novelty and softly letting his fingers release the solder's hands to caress over his callouses and into the softer parts of his palms. Tentatively, his eyes raised to Novelty's face, eager to gauge how the solder was responding to his words and his touch. But, he wasn't necessarily waiting for an answer, exactly. Instead, if Novelty still seemed open, he leaned forward to softly press their lips together once again.

Momentarily holding his breath, Novelty followed where Philip began leading the two of them. At first, Novelty thought they were headed back to camp, but then he got his bearings and realized they were headed instead to another part of the forest. Finding it difficult to believe that there was another secret destination Philip had in mind, Novelty assumed Philip was only trying to get away from the flowered meadow while still maintaining their privacy.

The thought sent a thrill through Novelty's lower belly and stomach, butterflies reemerging that had come and gone all day since overhearing Evan and... someone else in Evan's tent. Remembering the possibilities swirling around Lance and the excitement of earlier having thought that all the volunteers would be leaving tonight, Novelty had a lot of pent-up energy and eagerness that seemed very likely to have a release here shortly.

That said, the situation was complicated, and the longer that Philip and he remained silent as they walked into a new section of the woods, the more Novelty's anxiety caught up with him. While Philip's conviction about going to the goddess did render Philip's engagement null and void in Novelty's mind, there was still the matter that Philip alluded to back in his tent. Philip had... killed a man's spirit. Evan's spirit. Internally, though, thinking of it that way, it was absurd to think that Philip would have permanently damaged a man such as him. All the same, though, even the mere sight of Philip made Captain Rutliff visibly uncomfortable.

What did that have anything to do with Novelty, though? Only that he was very likely to get involved with a man who only recently... Well, Novelty reasoned, there's very little Philip might do to me that I wouldn't want, so what is there to worry about?

Philip seemed to find a place that satisfied him, which Novelty calculated was deep enough into the woods to avoid unwanted interruptions, assuming they weren't terribly loud. Novelty's stomach again exploded as Philip took a breath and turned toward him, caressing the softer parts of Novelty's hands.

Novelty closed his eyes, allowing himself to be drawn in by the current of fresh experiences, of bravery in the face of the unknown, of commitment to his very nature. It was a quiet, silent prayer he offered frequently, especially before beginning intimate experiences such as this one.

I don't want to do anything you don't want. Opening his eyes, Novelty heard this and wasn't immediately sure how to respond. The fact that Philip felt the need to say it out loud seemed to indicate that, on some level, Philip didn't mean--or didn't completely believe--what he was saying. But, the only fear that cultivated in Novelty was the possibility of Philip holding himself back. The mere thought left a poor taste in Novelty's mouth. Novelty wasn't here to have a surface-level interaction with the lieutenant; he wanted to encourage this man to open, to live as Novelty now knew the man could, or at least could talk about.

Before Novelty could think of anything to say, Philip began to lean in, reinitiating a kiss. Novelty leaned forward with his entire body, allowing anything and everything to graze up against Philip except their lips. Novelty held his neck and head back just enough so as to be able to see Philip clearly, a wide smile on his lips.

"And how will you know the difference, Philip?" Novelty said playfully before planting a single, deliberate kiss on the side of the lieutenant's neck and returning to look straight at the tall blond man.

Warmth cascaded up Philip’s body as Novelty pressed against him, but just when he thought certain their lips would touch again, the soldier pulled back--only just enough to avoid the kiss. Philip felt his cheeks go hot, and his hands grasped Novelty’s again, a bit tightly this time, almost as if to tether himself amidst a storm.

The lieutenant studied Novelty’s expression with some small flicker of panic in his eyes--had he already crossed a line somehow?--but Novelty was smiling, and panic quickly simmered to anger, though only a tiny flinch of his brow hinted at the transition. Was this soldier merely toying with him?

”And how will you know the difference, Philip?”

Novelty’s words stabbed straight through Philip, dissipating his anger and panic into a breathless emptiness. He felt dizzy, like he might collapse or simply float away. Then, in a blink, Novelty’s lips were on his neck, filling that emptiness with warmth and doing nothing to help Philip feel steady. He released Novelty’s hands to wrap his arms around the soldier, pulling him into a tight embrace and feeling their weight together on solid ground.

Philip blinked through blurry eyes at the trees over Novelty’s shoulder, awareness blooming of the tight knot in his throat and the tension throughout his body--he was very nearly shaking.

Gently, he took a step back from Novelty and steadied himself, his hands on the soldier’s shoulders to guide their careful distance apart. He met Novelty’s eyes apologetically, and then cast his gaze down towards the forest floor, trying to think now that he finally felt he had the capacity to do so. He… he truly did want to answer Novelty’s question, if he could.

Philip’s brows furrowed and he closed his eyes, grimacing as he thought of how Evan had fought. But, it wasn’t the fighting that was important, but rather, something beneath it; the captain had enjoyed fighting against getting pinned down in the first place. Philip felt sure of that. So then, what was the difference, between fighting to stay off the table one moment, and fighting to get off the table the next?

Philip opened his eyes and met Novelty’s gaze again, his own eyes worried but also studying. Novelty hadn’t sounded concerned when he’d asked his question. Rather, Philip might have called his tone daring, certainly when paired with that smile and kiss alongside it. Dare Philip say, Novelty might have been toying with him, in a certain respect… but not for lack of wanting to kiss Philip. Philip felt almost as sure of that as he’d felt of Evan’s thrill when he and Ramanujan had managed to pin the captain to the table, but now… now he didn’t have the goddess overriding the doubt that clouded over that certainty. It was so hard to trust that gut feeling alone. Surely there was some other assurance he and Novelty could provide each other.

Swallowing, Philip straightened his posture, and moved a hand to Novelty’s chin to gently tilt it up. Now, he studied Novelty’s expression with more calmness, observing and thinking with patience and curiosity rather than frantic desperation. After a moment, he leaned forward to murmur by Novelty’s ear.

“I’m listening,” the words were warm and smooth, lilting only slightly as Philip moved his hand to press it softly on Novelty’s chest. “To your spirit.”

He stepped closer again, one foot settling on the ground between Novelty’s feet, his groin pressing gently against the soldier’s hip. A great, searing thrill sparked up Philip’s core, pushing a slight, whispered gasp from his lips before he added, a bit breathless,

“Tell me, if I seem to be listening to the wrong thing.”

Fear and guilt and disgust all writhed in Philip’s gut, but the excitement and longing and hope that rang through his chest and stomach won out. He felt a steadiness in his diaphragm, a certainty that as long as he could just keep listening to Novelty, and not ever let himself try to drown Novelty out, then surely they would be all right.

As if to test something about that, Philip's free hand caressed up the back of Novelty's neck and into the soldier's hair, and then grasped tightly into it and tugged back--not far or hard, but enough to surely startle the soldier, and hopefully, enough to get Philip a glimpse of a refraction, to help him differentiate what he was truly listening to down the line.

Philip placed a hand under Novelty's chin and tugged upward slightly only to lean forward and whisper in Novelty's ear.

I'm listening...

The words made Novelty shiver internally--they were warm and inviting and curious and thoroughly decided.

...to your spirit.

In hearing that, Novelty could not help but think about Philip previously saying he had "killed a man's spirit." On the surface, then, Philip did not want to do that here. Novelty tilted his head slightly with curiosity, wondering exactly what Philip was listening to? What was the shape and sound of Novelty's spirit according to Philip? Novelty liked imagining that the the lieutenant could see vivid mental images of this abstract concept the way Novelty sometimes did. The soldier almost wanted to ask, but at the sensation of Philip's hand on his chest, Novelty let a breath escape his lips. He could feel his own heartbeat against Philip's hand. Or perhaps that was Philip's heartbeat. It was thrilling that he couldn't tell the difference.

And then, Philip was brave enough to step between Novelty's stance and press himself against Novelty's hip, eliciting an enormous spark of pleasure through Novelty's entire body as he closed his eyes to enjoy it. He wanted to melt, wanted to open and accept everything this man had to give him.

To exaggerate his point, Philip's fingers then wound into Novelty's hair and pulled firmly, and Novelty, surprised, inhaled sharply and his eyes flicked open. It felt... good, and Novelty didn't want Philip to stop or think that such things were crossing any lines. Pointedly, Novelty said nothing, looking curiously at Philip for a moment before he did start to melt, closing his eyes again and clutching instinctively to Philip's arm in front of him as he leaned his hip a little further into Philip. After a moment, Novelty reached with his arms around Philip's diaphragm, hungry and grasping. He didn't exactly know what he wanted from the man, but he wanted something, and maybe, if he were lucky, Philip would show him the path forward.

A series of terrible thoughts washed through Novelty's mind--terrible curiosities about what exactly Philip had done to Evan, and what exactly the goddess had done to Philip. Novelty suddenly wanted to ask Philip to do something to him that the goddess had done to Philip, but the soldier felt despair in his chest when his more rational mind assessed the risks of that. Philip wanted to get away from the goddess and her meadow--wouldn't it be unfair for Novelty to bring her up now? They would have plenty of her tomorrow, assumedly.

But, then again, there was little else Novelty could think of except the three of them engaging in some sensual dance together, the goddess' fingers dancing across Philip's and Novelty's naked backs while the two men's lips joined and pulled away, joined and pulled away.

"I'm everywhere and nowhere," Novelty said cryptically, trying to pull himself from the daydream, "and my spirit is enjoying dancing with yours."

The jolt of surprise in Novelty's sharp inhale echoed through Philip's body, sparking and lighting up nerves in ways that were exhilarating and terrifying. It made him feel like he was with the goddess again, but he tried to lean into the optimism of that--that she wasn't the only source of this feeling. In fact, this feeling was different, because it had started with his own action. There was a satisfaction and dare he say pride that accompanied it, knowing that he had impacted someone else, and wasn't merely just impacted himself.

But, he was supposed to be listening to Novelty.

The soldier said nothing, and his eyes had softened from surprise to curiosity, which seemed promising. Philip didn't see any fear or displeasure, which relaxed something in his chest with relief. And then, Novelty melted, his eyes sliding shut and his hand grasping at Philip's arm, stoking that satisfied feeling in Philip's chest into a flame, quickly joined by a building heat in his groin and his gut as Novelty's hip pushed more solidly against Philip's pants.

The lieutenant subtly tightened his grip in Novelty's hair, mostly just softly beckoning the soldier to continue riding the wave that he'd found. Philip was quite content for the moment to watch it crest and flow, moving his own hips to it only just-so, to feel the echoes of it in his own body, and to rest in this place, profoundly serene in the ways that he felt confident that everything was in hand.

He had only just started to ponder what he might like to transition to next when Novelty spoke.

"I'm everywhere and nowhere," the soldier said in his own serenity, "and my spirit is enjoying dancing with yours."

Warmth splashed through Philip's chest, and he allowed himself to ride his own wave as he fluidly used his grip in Novelty's hair to draw the soldier into a kiss, deep and passionate from the start. The hand on Novelty's chest pressed firmly, fingers starting to curl into fabric. Then he tugged Novelty's hair again, a bit harder, pulling him away from the kiss as Philip's lips trailed down Novelty's jaw and to his neck, and the hand on Novelty's chest trailed downwards, caressing over the soldier's ribs and hip until he reached around to cup Novelty's backside through his pants, pulling his hip all the closer.

He paused there, then, not exactly stopping the way his hand held the soldier's form or the way his lips caressed skin, but he focused in on those activities, freeing up momentum to listen to the soldier as promised, and ensure he was still taking note of Novelty's responses. A hunger certainly started to flare within Philip--one that thrallhood even to a goddess never stood a chance at sating--but becoming a beast would hardly sate it, either. If he was going to get his fill before returning himself into the goddess' hands, he had to keep listening, and, while he was still learning the subtle cords of Novelty's song, that required going a certain sort of slow, at least at the start.

Philip must have gotten the message because the lieutenant's fingers only tightened their grip in Novelty's hair, the sensation pushing Novelty over the edge of something. His self-control, maybe? He swayed slightly from side to side and hardly noticed when his own fingers sneaked under the back of Philip's shirt, pressing into the skin of Philip's lower back on either side of his spine, both to stabilize himself and to give Philip some small sensation. It felt the least he could do given Philip's willingness to take the lead. Novelty was happy to follow.

The lieutenant swayed with Novelty, adding the slightest bit of friction between their bodies where Philip's length pressed up against his hip. Novelty's eyes rolled back in his head as his longing for this type of contact fully broke free of whatever wariness he had been holding onto.

There was, perhaps, some lingering concern that Philip might not be enjoying this himself, but something about the sway of Philip's body communicated pride to Novelty, which only encouraged Novelty to give into the sensations. The pressure of Philip's hand against Novelty's chest increased, and Novelty felt as though Philip now had his fast-beating heart in his hand, massaging and caressing it with a mounting pleasure. It felt vulnerable, and while Novelty might have otherwise been tempted toward changing actions or intensifying the dynamic, he was none too eager to move away from that particular sensation. It gave him a kind of hope, ill-founded as it may have been, that Philip wanted Novelty to believe it was possible for Philip to fully and truly touch his heart. Hold his heart, even.

In that moment, overwhelmed by all the subtle sensations, Novelty wanted to believe it.

Philip's lips found Novelty's passionately and urgently, removing Novelty's ability for coherent thought as the pressure of their enjoined lips amplified and mirrored the pressure of their hips. When Philip's hand tightened yet further in Novelty's hair as the lieutenant pulled out of the kiss, the soldier could not help but cry out subtly, his scalp growing tender, but he did not exactly want Philip to stop.

Novelty was at first disappointed when the pressure moved away from his chest, but he paid close attention to each of the places Philip was eager to visit on his body, first Novelty's ribs, each bone feeling individually caressed, and then onward to Novelty's hips, which caused the soldier his first full, unrestrained thrust in Philip's direction. While some embarrassment pooled in his belly over the involuntary motion, it dissipated quickly as Philip's hand reached to cup Novelty's backside.

The soldier's knees bent of their own accord, then, forcing Philip's hand to catch a small portion of Novelty's weight as the soldier slid slightly up and down against the front of Philip's pants. He wanted to encourage the man. He wanted Philip to continue being brave and exploring and listening this way. Thinking ever so briefly to the lieutenant's melancholy when Novelty had first come to speak with him, Novelty was thrilled and amazed at the unrestricted version of Philip before him now who had Novelty eating out of the palms of his hands.

Philip felt Novelty buckle, weight pressing down on Philip's hand and thigh, and a soft hum of a satisfied moan reverberated in his throat. Gods it felt good to impact someone like this, but his breathing also started to get a little heavy, fear and arousal mixing together in his chest. He loved how Novelty was swaying in his arms, everywhere and nowhere like he'd said, but he realized he was struggling to listen now, amidst a worry that started to swirl through his awareness, demanding a satisfaction of its own.

"Novelty," Philip said softly, his voice a warm murmur. The hand in Novelty's hair relaxed its grip, tenderly spreading its fingers to cradle the back of the soldier's head. A soft silence echoed in the air as Philip thought on what to say next. He didn't want to disturb the soldier's state if it wasn't necessary... but unfortunately, Philip couldn't find another way to ease his mind. If Novelty truly wanted to be as he presently was, he reassured himself, then surely it wouldn't be difficult to get him back there.

"Can you stand up straight for me?" Philip's words were gentle, and he didn't immediately move, but after a beat he did slowly start shifting to subtly guide Novelty's posture, the hand on the soldier's backside sliding demurely to his hip as Philip's own hips shifted to allow at least a sliver of distance between them. He didn't necessarily feel they needed to break all contact, but he did want to feel confident that Novelty could stand on his own. If it seemed he couldn't, then Philip certainly wasn't about to force it, but it would be a touch alarming.

Drifting amidst the amazement of his own bliss, Novelty heard his name on Philip's lips and sank deeper into his own sensation. He wanted to suck every drop of life from this experience, and that felt like exactly what Philip wanted, too. Novelty hummed and vibrated his closed lips as Philip loosened his grip on Novelty's hair, and the sensation of the blood returning--no, rushing back--to his scalp was heady and dizzying. Perhaps they should head toward the ground now...?

Can you stand up straight for me?

The words were hazy in Novelty's mind, and it took him a moment to catch their meaning. Before he had, Philip was already shifting and moving away from Novelty, the pressure on the soldier's hip releasing entirely. It seemed that something was wrong, and it didn't take long for Novelty's army training to kick in as his vigilance began the work of pushing through his bliss. With a subtle start, Novelty took a half step back himself as Philip's hands removed themselves from Novelty's backside and settled demurely on Novelty's hips. Novelty blinked a few times and looked at Philip with some concern, worried about what might have changed. He looked around them then, but didn't immediately see anything in their environment that might present a danger. Actually, with dusk quickly fading toward evening, it was quite calm and pleasant. The edges of Novelty's vigilance thus softened, he decided to take a risk, wrapping his arms around Philip's neck.

"Yes," Novelty said, "I can do that." Then, smiling somewhat mischievously, he asked, "Is there anything else you would like me to do for you, Lieutenant?"

It was strangely relieving to see Novelty competently surveying their surroundings, indeed standing on his own two feet and looking alert and in charge of himself, even if it had all been preceded by a start. Still, as much as relief flowed through Philip's chest, guilt also coiled in his stomach, like he had somehow mislead Novelty just because he himself was feeling scared...and about what, exactly?

"Yes, I can do that." Novelty surprised Philip by wrapping his arms around Philip's neck, a mischievous grin lighting his expression. "Is there anything else you would like me to do for you, Lieutenant?"

A faint plume of laughter bubbled up Philips throat, but uncertainty all but dissipated it, and in the end the brief bloom of mirth simply tugged just slightly at his lips before letting them return to their soft, neutral resting expression. Meanwhile, Philip studied Novelty's face, perhaps searching for any hint that the mischievous grin might be trying to cover over something else.

"I don't want to trap you." Philip finally said, his words a little mumbled and his eyes drifting slightly to the side, a hint of apology tugging at his brow. His hands went a little limp, though still lightly kept contact with Novelty's hips, not quite willing to give that up despite their newfound shyness. He felt embarrassed that he was hung up on this, but there didn't seem to be a way around it. His eyes looked quite seriously at a tree just over Novelty's shoulder while he searched for what else he needed.

((OOC: And, he will likely find something else to say or do in not too long, but it'll prolly take him long enough that it made sense to pause there if Novelty wants to do or say something or even just react before Philip continues.))