Written Wonderland

Mizu took a few moments to gather herself back in the strategy tent before wondering what she should do next. She desperately wished she knew whether the goddess was still in camp; she should have had the soldier who woke followed. Perhaps she could track him down now? Or would that waste valuable time?

Before she could answer her own question, she heard Elaine's voice outside the tent. "Permission to enter, Commander?"

"Granted," Mizu said curtly, wondering how other army commanders did it, what with there never being a moment a rest. Still, she needed to persevere, and at least this meant Mizu had one fewer person to seek out.

"Commander, did you... did you experience the shimmer?" Elaine was out of breath, and her face was flushed. Mizu wondered if Elaine had had a similar reaction to the mist as she had.

"Yes," Mizu said, curious if there was more to Elaine's question.

"That was... do you think that was the goddess' doing, then?" Elaine asked. "I saw one of the soldiers she had attacked lift up his arm and release the shimmering dome, and then he collapsed. Last I saw, he was being carried to the infirmary tent. But, I have a hard time believing that the soldier accomplished the shimmer on his own."

Mizu's eyebrows lifted. Now this was new information. Mizu hoped that the goddess had left the body of the soldier such that the commander didn't need to worry about the goddess--at least in her physical form--anymore, but perhaps that was too much to hope for.

"Yes, the goddess made the display at my request," Mizu admitted. "The nature of the negotiation has shifted." Mizu paused there, not entirely sure she wanted to give out more information yet. "Please see to it that the soldier the goddess employed is under watch at all times. I am under the impression that the goddess has ceased her possession of him, but caution is still necessary." Elaine looked deeply uncomfortable at the idea of the man being possessed, but she nodded and made some mental calculations about who she could have take care of that.

"Then, did you meet with the goddess directly?" Elaine asked, mild confusion showing in her features. Mizu looked up at her from the table where she was sitting. It was difficult to admit that she didn't even want to stand right now. She needed more rest. And more peace. But when to get it in the middle of a war?

"In a manner of speaking. She wanted more than Evan as her go-between. And she informed me that she would release the Shel'ti in exchange for ten of our men." Mizu watch this information settle over Elaine. As she sorted through what that meant, Mizu continued, "Evan is confident that some of our soldiers would volunteer, for the sake of the cause if not for the sake of themselves. Captain Miller has been informed and has requested we recruit none of his men but is otherwise... tolerant of the idea."

"Ten men..." Elaine whispered, deeply uncomfortable with the idea of losing people she had gotten close with. Every man they lost in battle was a heartbreak, and this... well, at least they would get a chance to say goodbye.

Mizu's concern grew. What if Elaine would be resistant to the idea? On the one hand, it wasn't as if Elaine would go against her, but Mizu also didn't want to force the woman into the situation. Mizu thought about giving Elaine a way out but couldn't see a good one. She opted for silence, waiting for Elaine to sort out her own emotions.

"With Shel'ti allies and the goddess' help with the king..." Elaine started.

"...we would lose a lot fewer men than we would if we didn't take the goddess up on this deal," Mizu finished, hoping that was a good enough argument for her captain. Elaine nodded.

"What if she tries to up-negotiate again? It seems like every time Evan visits her, she wants something different." This had also been troubling Mizu, but there might not be anything they could do about that. Regardless, at minimum, the goddess was willing to negotiate, and Mizu reminded herself that the goddess' freedom on the line as well.

"Then we threaten to prevent Evan from visiting her. I have an idea that that would make an impression. From what Evan has said, she is more desperate than she lets on." Elaine nodded again, and Mizu had high hopes that the woman was coming around.

"Why did we give in to her demands this time, then? Why not try to talk her down further? Ten men?" Elaine asked. They were fair questions, but all of that negotiating had taken place outside of Mizu's line of sight, and she wasn't in a mood to defend Evan.

"You'll need to ask Evan that question. But, rest assured, he will be instructed to put heavy pressure against any further demands she might make."

"All right," Elaine said, satisfied for now. "What do you need me to do?"

After informing Elaine to start searching for and talking to soldiers who might be interested in volunteering to go to the goddess, Elaine took her leave, and Mizu sat with her head on her hands at the map table, breathing a heavy sigh.

It's worth it. It's worth it to trade for the Shel'ti. It's just ten men. Ten men in exchange for... But then Mizu realized that something had been bothering her. Why trade the Shel'ti captives for fewer of their soldiers? What made her soldiers more valuable to the goddess? That they were somewhat more willing to go to her? That seemed like the only logical explanation. Any of the other possible explanations did not feel... well... divine. Mizu resolved to ask Evan when he came to check in with her. She wondered how long from now that would be.

Deciding that she wasn't going to be of much use to anyone if she didn't get at least a few minutes of rest, she took off the bulkiest parts of her armor and lay down on her cot, still fully prepared to be at attention if anyone were to come in, but...

Mizu dozed, and it was heavenly. The heavy darkness of dreamless sleep pleasantly crushed her under its weight as she fell back into the sweet abyss of thoughtlessness.

When she woke, she quickly donned her armor again and ventured outside to check the position of the sun. She had lost a couple hours to her cot, but she already felt worlds better. Two hours uninterrupted. Must be plenty to keep the soldiers busy. Rumors, perhaps? Talk about the shimmer? Whatever it was, she was grateful no one urgently needed her input. But, at the same time, shouldn't Evan have woken up by now? He did seem beat after whatever he had undergone with the goddess, but...

No sense in worrying about it until sundown, but it did make the commander anxious to get moving on the volunteers. Best not keep a goddess waiting long, she imagined. Grateful that she had already had cause to talk to Elaine and Yukiko, Mizu only had to think for a moment before she knew that Captain Kade would be the right person to reach out to next. Surely he would know of a few soldiers who would be willing to venture into this unknown.

Looking around, she quickly found one of her runner boys and sent them off to ask for Serio. She didn't want to risk being gone when Evan tried to check in. If he checks in, she thought, but it was only fair to give him the benefit of the doubt. Out of anyone in the army right now, Evan had the most and highest priority tasks to do, and thus far, he had taken that role very seriously.

I feel like I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing.

Remembering the way Evan said that, Mizu was again moved. She was grateful that at least one person under her command had found purpose here.

When Captain Kade arrived, Mizu was casually pacing the length of the strategy tent, she looked up and gave Serio a very slight smile.

"Thank you for your promptness, as ever, Captain Kade. There are a few matters I wish to discuss with you." Knowing that Captain Kade frequently kept an ear to the ground about camp rumors and goings-on, she figured she may as well ask what he already knew rather than waste breath. "Other than what we discussed at the captain's meeting, how much do you know about the current situation with the goddess?"

Serio placed a hand to his chest and gave Mizu a slight bow, a gentle smile on his face as she thanked him for his promptness. He straightened up again and took a leisurely breath as he contemplated how to answer the commander's question. His first instinct was to calculate how cryptic he could get away with being; an old habit, from a time when honesty was much more dangerous for him than it was now. He silently reassured the snakes in his chest, and they relaxed and allowed him to speak plainly.

"She made that lovely display this morning, I presume to inspire the confidence of volunteers." His voice grew just a bit more velvety on that last word, his smile subtly curling along with it. He took stock of Mizu's expression on his reply, in part to judge how much more he need say in order to communicate to her what he knew. He decided to continue, lest he force his commander to read between the lines more than she cared to.

"The last of our stolen men have been returned, and Captain Rutliff has started recruiting soldiers to go back to her in exchange for her release of the Shel'ti." Serio paused briefly there, separating a conveyance of simple facts from some assessment. "At this point, news about that is spreading quickly, and not without contemplation, although I'm not yet sure how much follow-through will come of it."

Then, the captain gave another pause, this one a bit heavier. Now he separated information which was safe to share in the light from something a little more whispered, and less keen to come out. A subtle inward shrug of his shoulders hinted as much.

"Also, I don't think many realize, but... she stopped by to see the prince before her display. Perhaps Captain Fujiwara told you."

Serio's expression was calm and soft, his tone very careful to keep accusation out of it. After all, it would only be an accusation if Yukiko didn't in fact tell Mizu about it, which Serio doubted. Yukiko was discreet, but highly cooperative. No, mostly he mentioned this, because he was curious about the prince and the goddess. He had his hunches, but none he felt confident enough to say aloud just yet. He wondered if Mizu would be willing to offer him the last piece he needed for that picture to click into place.

While Mizu was not necessarily a stickler on formalities, she definitely appreciated when they were present and was deeply satisfied with the slight change in Serio's posture and its indicated respect. His smile, while outwardly reassuring, was also unsettling as it stirred sensations in her gut of conflict--both confidence and distrust. It was the conflict of those physical sensations that made Serio such a difficult person to interact with. He had his secrets--of that Mizu was certain--but the two of them had made great strides over the years such that Mizu calmed as soon as Serio started speaking, reminding herself just how much his ability to be forthcoming with her had improved.

Something in Mizu's chest stuck on the word lovely, but she continued listening. Serio's tone of voice changed as he pronounced the word "volunteers," and again there was a stirring in her stomach and her chest. Gods, would that she could get through just one of Serio's sentences without such confusion! Still, she was pleased that at least Serio understood the shimmer the way Mizu had meant it. And, as he continued listing off what he knew, Mizu grew more and more impressed and grateful that there was little she needed to fill him in on. The sensations of conflict returned with force as Serio hesitated before mentioning the prince, however. The commander knew she should not be surprised about his knowledge of that, but he was dangerously close to understanding the significance of the situation--if he hadn't already pieced it together. Mizu was certain he at least held a guess.

What would the point of keeping information from him be? What was the risk of Serio knowing that Ponderance was also the goddess' child? Would that in any way change Serio's loyalty? Mizu never knew how to answer that question. It was Serio's loyalty she doubted the most; his was the most obscure of ideologies. Most of the others--Evan, Yukiko, Elaine, Blake, Caleb, and even Joseph--were plain in their thoughts and feelings. Serio was... slippery.

With another bout of sensation in her chest and abdomen, she finally placed what was happening. Good gods. Her unshakable expression cracked for the span of a moment, and a subtle half-smile--very nearly giddy in nature--crossed her features before she hastily brought it under control. The commander chalked it up to the fact that they were working with the goddess of desire, after all. Was it so unbelievable that she might be having some errant thoughts considering that? And, come to think of it, Serio did bear a number of resemblances to Phantom...

But there were urgent matters at hand.

"Captain Fujiwara informed me of the situation shortly after the shimmer appeared. The goddess hadn't fully released one of the soldiers and used him to pay me a visit as well." Mizu hoped that offering Serio more information--albeit in a direction that veered away from the information she suspected he wanted--would placate him enough. While it might not be information she needed to hide, she also didn't feel like making it easy for him. He could ask her, if he liked.

"As ever, you prove yourself to be an irreplaceable asset. I am impressed." Mizu briefly considered how differently this might all be going down if Captain Kade had been the one to summon the goddess and repressed a shiver at the thought. "Captain Rutliff has his hands full, and I want to offer him help with recruiting the volunteers. Naturally, I wanted to seek you out as soon as possible, should you be amenable to the idea. What do you make of the whole arrangement?" Mizu certainly did not want to blaze forward if her captains did not agree with her decisions, and though she felt confident that Mizu would have a majority if there were a disagreement, she still wanted to know what Serio thought of the plan. Nonchalantly, Mizu clasped her hands behind her back and stood facing the captain.

In Mizu's response came one surprise after another--first the flash of a nearly giddy expression, and then a bit of information Serio hadn't thought to fish for, though in hindsight made sense: that the goddess had visited the commander. He let his eyebrows raise just enough to indicate his surprise while still keeping his expression subtle. Mizu moved straight from that tidbit to praising Serio for his intelligence, to which he gave another soft smile and bow. Despite his mild disappointment at Mizu's dodge, her comments genuinely pleased him; he did rather enjoy being that kind of asset.

The captain donned a thoughtful expression when Mizu asked his opinion on the situation. He was used to guarding his opinions even more closely than his knowledge, but again reminded the snakes in his chest to relax. Still, even that accomplished, it took some contemplation to settle on the truth of the matter.

"Strategically, it makes sense. I worry some of the tone in camp is discomfort with the thought of trading people, but I think a little nudging can reframe that. It would help if we had more solid terms... Captain Rutliff has claimed he'll try to find fresh volunteers at the end of the war to trade out, essentially, but it's hard to tell how much confidence that's inspired."

Serio paused there, both because he guessed he'd just told Mizu something new and genuinely wanted to give her a moment to digest, and because he knew he'd still been evading the heart of her question, and he wanted to give himself another moment to double-check his approach before finally answering in earnest.

"In any case, you won't find any disapproval from me, commander. Seeking out only those who agree to go seems just enough, and that aside, I approve of doing what needs to be done. I'm cautiously optimistic that enough of our soldiers will agree, and I'm happy to aid in that regard."

Mizu appreciated that Serio hadn't already known that the goddess had come to her. She enjoyed surprising him. It was rare.

She took his feedback and nodded, thoughtful and grateful for the input. She was also in alignment about the shifting sand of the goddess' terms and was equally uncomfortable, though negotiation wasn't exactly her strongsuit either. That's why she was the one on the field. The commander knew Serio would be good at negotiating, but she also suspected that, wherever the tides turned, they would always turn in Serio's favor if she kept him too near all that.

At the thought of trading out the volunteers, though, Mizu's eyes flickered toward Serio's. This was new information. Why did it seem so absurd to her? When did Rutliff have a chance to tell Serio--or, really, tell anyone--that with everything going on? That was information from last night, and Rutliff hadn't... Evan must be around camp about it already then. She thought he would have come to see her first. Mizu started to get nervous. How much else of the situation was getting ahead of her?

It was a sly reminder that Serio would continue to keep her on her toes, but for now, he was offering her grace, which she deeply appreciated. She imagined he understood the value of Evan as a loose cannon, even if it were never discussed.

But trading out the volunteers... it was theoretically possible. Hadn't King Shalbuleth said that his men returned, more or less, after months? Many months, Mizu thought but still chided herself momentarily for assuming that they would be giving the volunteers like sacrifices to the goddess. If there was really a chance that they could set up a rotation...

Then again, that was the thing. The soldiers wouldn't come back the same. Some part of them would be permanently altered. It would be, Mizu suspected, a kind of death. A death to wanting much of anything else. Of listlessness. Isn't that what the king had described? Was there any guarantee that the goddess wouldn't do that to volunteers? Would she do worse to them? There was no way to really know.

But would they change any more with the goddess any more than life itself would change them? Yes, she supposed they would.

So, yes, more solid terms would be lovely, but they didn't have that luxury.

But, Mizu didn't need to defend herself. After all, Serio was offering his opinion. He was optimistic they could do it. And he would not stand against it. Excellent.

In response, she wanted badly to ask Serio how he knew about Evan's plans, but that would be a show of everyone's cards, and Mizu was content enough with Serio's help to not need that.

"There's so much we don't know about what will happen to these volunteers," Mizu said with confidence, "so I want to plan for all scenarios. I intend to send only those who genuinely want to go, and I trust you to find me at least a few men who might actually return." The commander was also confident that Serio would see the incredible value in that. If there was ever intrigue and information to be had, it was at the hands of the gods. Where else was it more important to place spies?

"The released men..." Mizu added after some thought, "...what are the other soldiers saying about them?"

Serio gave his commander yet another pleasant bow. Yes, he had a few possible candidates in mind. It was a tricky calculation to weigh the value they could potentially bring back with the risk of losing them, but one he felt confident making.

Straightening up, the captain thought for a moment on Mizu's next question.

"From what I understand, they've all been rather tight-lipped, and sensitive about the goddess, or whatever transpired with her. Rumors abound about what transpired, but as of today, Evan has given the only actual account I know of, about his own experiences."

Serio paused there, his eyebrow raised just so to inquire as to whether the commander seemed interested in those specific details, or hasty for more general information.

((OOC: feel free to make a short reply or just lmk what Mizu's in-the-moment response would look like, if either of those feel appropriate. Or, y'know, obvs full post if you feel so inspired. Serio just insisted that he'd take a very subtle cue to go in very different directions here.))

While Serio was taking the conversation a direction that was not necessarily aligned with the commander's purpose in her initial question, she found it prudent to nod slightly as Serio raised an eyebrow. It was an invitation, and she would accept it. It would be good to have Serio's take on what Evan was actually telling people around camp. She trusted him to stick to the facts--as much as he could tell them from fictions--however strange they might be.

She could ask more about the other men later.

Having received an indication towards interest from the commander, Serio smoothly continued.

"Captain Rutliff made an appearance at the mess tent not long ago, where he spoke with awe and elation of his time with the goddess. With her, he claims he's both ridden on the back of a dragon, and summoned down lightning from the sky. But, he's also troubled. Of course, not that he clarified, but the cracks in his adoration were dark, and notable. The soldiers we send will face a being who frightens that man."

Was Serio perhaps getting poetic with the details he'd heard? Sure, but he honestly thought this would be far more useful to Mizu than a dry retelling of snippets pieced together. Evan had made quite a splash with his appearance, and Serio felt confident he'd captured the general impression that was making its way around camp, and wasn't that what Mizu was most interested in anyway?

The captain let stand a pause for drama, but did continue, not wanting to leave Mizu on a completely sour note.

"And, inspires the most reverence I may have ever seen from him."

Mizu took in everything Serio was saying in total before she parsed the individual pieces of it, as was typical of her interactions with Serio. They were reliably dense in nature. She closed her eyes when she thought Serio was finished speaking to control her expressions and collect her thoughts.

While some part of her thought it was somewhat childish that Evan was running around telling extravagant stories about the goddess and what he had done with her, it was likely doing just as much to invigorate the troops toward volunteering as the shimmer had, so in the end, she supposed that was good, if tactless.

And then there was the piece Mizu wished were not true: that there were cracks in Evan's adoration. Mizu had hoped that the resistance Evan had to sharing candidly was more about the luridness of the encounters than doubt in the goddess herself. Or fear. And Serio was saying it was fear. Something in the commander's chest stung. It was not encouraging to think that her most fearless captain was afraid. And very likely unable to say why. Perhaps she could coax it out of him? Ah, but she was likely exactly the person he would most not want to tell, whatever it was. Mizu braved a very quiet sigh at that. Were they in different positions, perhaps, but that was not reality.

But then Serio added his comment about reverence, and Mizu's hope was somewhat bolstered. It matched with what Evan himself had told her. Absolute fear and conviction. How? She remembered the Shel'ti had not a pantheon of gods like Asphodel but a monotheistic belief structure that held that there was only one god, one who struck fear in the heart of men. Mizu did not want to believe in a god of that nature. And yet, the commander had met an embodiment of the goddess herself, possessing one of her own soldiers. Wasn't there both fear and conviction in the power of even that single action? And how much more directly had Evan experienced all of that? With the goddess in her wholly present form?

Mizu opened her eyes and stared passively at the floor, contemplating her next move.

"I doubt anyone would call her a god if she didn't inspire both," the commander said quietly, and realized in that moment that she understood the line the goddess must be riding. The commander herself often treaded a similar path, at once demanding respect nigh onto fear as well as fierce loyalty.

But, all that didn't mean they weren't still risking the troops they would send directly to the goddess. They absolutely were. And this was a goddess with a history of unpredictability.

"Unfortunately, we have little choice but to acquiesce her," Mizu added, looking directly at Serio now and deciding not to immediately ask another question to see if there was anything else Serio would freely offer. It was unlikely, but she wanted to try.